Sans Auto

Respect

2011-07-12T20:24:00.004-06:00

Cycling is often an overlooked sport. People see guys in spandex and think it's sort of a wimpy sport. How tough could a sport be when guys where outfits like that? Here's an example. This guy was riding along when a car bumped into his group and he ended up in the ditch.

Oh, and after the ditch he went over the handlebars into a barbed wire fence. While traveling at 20+ mph. Wearing typical football gear. OK, no he wasn't, he was wearing nothing but a thin layer of spandex. The guy got up, got on a new bike (original bike was wrapped around a fence pole) and finished the race. At the finish line he received a couple of big awards that he had earned earlier in the race before going to the hospital and receiving 30 stitches. And he woke up today, got on his bike and raced again.

When is the last time that you saw a professional athlete go through an injury like this and continue? Real men wear spandex... and shave their legs.

(I'm posting a couple of graphic photos below from velogogo, continue at your own risk, but they're really not that bad.)

New blog

2011-07-07T22:37:00.002-06:00

I started a new blog. I wanted a place where I could write very specifically about my efforts to live sustainably. It's sort of instructional, sort of experimental and it just has a different tone than this blog has. I also put in ads and things so that I could potentially make money from sales of stuff (mostly books). I think I'll still write here on occasion, but I'm writing almost daily over at my other home. Check it out here.

One sided equation

2011-06-28T11:48:00.002-06:00

Yesterday I went on one of the most beautiful bike rides of my life. From Olympia to Brooklyn. I got off the beaten path and onto a road that wound through the hills of the area. Eventually the road turned to dirt and it started going up.

I need to take a step back and describe Brooklyn. For decades I have driven to my grandparents house and gone the long way around this massive void where there is nothing. Actually, there isn't 'nothing', that is where Brooklyn is. It just seems that while there are three roads that lead to Brooklyn, only one of them is paved. And the paved road doesn't go toward my grandparents' house. I had always seen the signs to Brooklyn, but never thought much about it since they seem to lead to nowhere. As I'm thinking of riding my bike to my grandparents' house, I found a shortcut through Brooklyn. It just seems that it takes a bunch of logging roads through Brooklyn. Yesterday I went to see how bad the logging roads were.

Pretty soon I'm going to move onto the point that I want to make. On the logging road to Brooklyn, there are no telephone poles, no road signs and only the occasional white post to indicate where the side of the road is. Not only that, but there was virtually no litter. Over the 11 miles to Brooklyn, I found one empty bottle of brake fluid. I'm glad that I wasn't on the road while the logging truck with no brakes was there.

I came to a couple of overlooks and I could look out over miles and miles of hills and not see a single power line, cell tower or anything that appears to be man made. Well, there didn't seem to be anything man made except for vast expanses of clear cuts. Come to think of it, the only reason there were overlooks was because I was in the middle of an area that had recently been clear cut.

I got to thinking about how I found the great beauty in being away from the pollution created by man, but I hardly noticed the devastation in the clear cuts. Looking out over the hills of trees at different stages of growth (or destruction) looked like rolling hills in the Midwest that grow corn and soybeans. You could see the outline of crops being harvested and it made the Midwest seem so small.

As I rode along, I thought of things that are similar to my recognition of the beauty while overlooking the devastation of the clear cut. I thought of finances of most American families. Most people focus on making more money. If we aren't happy or if we don't have everything that you want, it is because we don't make enough money. We look at making more money as the solution. Like on my bike ride, I was originally just looking at the lack of pollution, most people in their finances only look at their lack of resources.

When you take a step back, you can see that maybe it's not all about making money, but rather being content with what you have or changing what you buy (or don't buy) so that you don't have to make as much money. Despite the fact that there were very few things that I saw that looked like pollution, pollution also appeared in the form of things that men tore down. Despite the fact that people are feeling the crunch, they could buy less instead of making more. There is more than one side to each equation, make sure that you see them.

Extremism

2011-06-13T23:44:00.002-06:00

I have read a couple of books recently that have made me think a lot. The first book I read was about a group of eco-terrorists that started by pulling up survey stakes and ended up blowing up bridges and trying to blow up a major dam. It was interesting that I could easily relate with the characters at the beginning of the book, and I could see how the characters kept getting pulled in to more and more serious crimes. Don't get me wrong, I will never blow up bridges or dams, no matter how bad they may be for the environment, but I could see how well intentioned people could end up there. ( I should point out that this was a work of fiction)

The other book that I am currently reading is about religious extremism. The book talks of well intentioned believers who find some odd teachings that they take to an extreme. After a series of events the people in the book become more extreme until God tells them to kill people. And they do. It is unbelievably disturbing how people who truly feel like they are doing what is right can end up killing innocent people. I'm a good person. I believe in God. I don't believe that God would tell kill someone, but the commonalities that I have with this guy disturb me. (Unfortunately this was a true story.)

In reading these stories I think of extremist and the opposite of extremism. I figure the average Joe who goes to work every day, does his job and dreams of things that he will never have the courage to try is the opposite of extreme. Sure, there are people who chase their dreams without being dangerous extremists, but the dangerous extremists were following their true beliefs with passion. When people find those motivational quotes that they like to read, they tend to encourage people to 'think outside the box' and follow their dreams. I like those quotes. I want to follow my dreams and they aren't traditional. I would love to live on a farm without electricity growing my own food and working side by side with my children and wife. I would love to go without owning a car. I am willing to give up a lot of traditional comforts in order to pursue various dreams that I have, whether it's simply a dream to be closer to family or if it is the right time to start a farm without electricity.

I like to think of myself as a logical person and when I take a step back, my ideals seem a lot more extreme than where the 'extremists' started. Does that mean that I should make my dreams closer to mainstream? Do I need to attend a job and not ask questions? I don't think that is the case. Maybe the difference is that I can live my ideals without breaking the law. The extremists all broke the law well before they started injuring people or blowing stuff up. So as long as I don't break the law I'm fine.

That is a nice thought, but I still don't like it. Some of my greatest heroes broke the law. Martin Luther King, Gandhi, Rosa Parks. They broke the law for the betterment of the world. My goal is not to break the law, but my ideal in life is to improve the world in whatever small way I can and historically that has often involved breaking the law.

My ultimate goal in life is to not live like everyone else. I want to make a difference. The worst way to do that is to live like everyone else. In order to make a big difference, you have to live a big life. You have to be extreme like MLK, Gandhi and Jesus himself. And you need to somehow make sure that you don't end up in the wrong kind of extremist group.

And I have another job interview on Friday. Unfortunately, there are many other jobs that I want more than I want that one. On some levels I'm afraid of being offered a job that I don't really want because I might take it.

And soon I'm going to start reading my next book about Buddhist monks. That way I can contemplate peace and love rather than extremists that end up doing bad things.

Torn

2011-06-06T23:51:00.002-06:00

Last weekend we spent a lot of time attending the Mother Earth News Fair. It made me come alive. I loved being around people interested in community and putting community and nature before the rushed lifestyle that most people follow. I have really struggled to bond with people and really get to know them. On a little community garden tour I felt like I really made friends. People who were interested in the same things that interest me. People whose friends I'm interested in getting to know. I loved being in that community and the impact that those people are trying to make in the world. I want to be a part of that.

And so my job search continues. I've had some job interviews, but no job offers. I took a class that has qualified me for a slightly different line of jobs and I'm excited about an upcoming interview. At the same time, there is something missing. The jobs I've interviewed for are things that interest me, things that I'm trained in and things that I can do well at. They just aren't things that I'm REALLY passionate about. The problem is that those things that I'm REALLY passionate about are things that I don't have any experience doing and the jobs associated with them don't pay all that well. (and I'm not in an especially lucrative field anyway).

One thing that I've discovered in the last several months of being out of work is that it really doesn't take that much money to get by. Sure, we are parasites to my Sister and Brother-in-Law, but if this were not available, there are other opportunities around for free utilities, but it would drastically reduce my opportunities for real jobs. The point is that I dream of being a part of a community and doing what I am passionate about and I think that my family could thrive on less money if we do things differently... If we do things different than most people, but more similar to what we are doing now.

No matter what I do, I'm really looking forward to spending time with others who have the same passions as I do. I have let my insecurities keep me out of that group for too long (I feel that I just don't know enough about those topics, and I hate feeling like the dumb guy in the group), I will get involved no matter what kind of job I get. But ideally, I would really like to work in my areas of passion. I am positive that I would put more into a job and make a bigger difference in a job that I'm passionate about than one that I was educated to perform.

I'm really excited about my job interview later this week because it has benefits, but it is three 10 hour days instead of a full work week. That would give me time to do both pursue my passions and do something that I was educated to do. When I step back and take a look at my situation, I'm really excited that I haven't found a job yet because it forces me to pursue my passions and it disappoints me that I've been looking primarily where my education lies... It's time to pursue my dreams and let the education stuff slide a little. That's exciting.

IF YOU REALLY NEED TO BE HEARD... don't say anything

2011-05-16T19:41:00.002-06:00

This is a weird period in my life. I'm looking for a job, but that gets old really quick. You can only look at lists of jobs that you aren't interested in or not qualified for for so long. I've also been spending time with family and that has been great. In my free time I've been reading and watching stuff. Last week I watched a TED video about a guy that found that he spent too much time trying to convince people to be environmentally friendly and not enough time listening. One day, he decided to go a day without talking; a day of silence. He ended up going 17 years without talking.

I've also been reading a book called, "The Tao of Inner Peace" and it has challenged me to do some different things. I keep thinking that I should, but not now. I thought of doing a day of silence, but I kept thinking that I needed a cause. I wanted to spend a day or week in silence to commemorate something or to make a point. I don't have anything to commemorate or points to make, so I put it off. As I continued reading my book, I kept thinking that there are a lot of things that I keep putting off for one reason or another. Therefore, I decided to be silent today just because it is what I feel I should do. Boy, I wish it had been more important, but I'm just doing it for myself.

I didn't really tell anyone I was going to do it today, but I had talked to my wife about being silent at some point. When I woke up today, I thought of it, so I haven't spoken today. It was funny, after being up for 10-15 minutes my wife looked at me and said, "Oh, I get it, you're not talking today".

While the day isn't over, I've learned TONS by doing this. The first thing is the power of silence. Normally when my kids start to fight, I tell them to knock it off. And if they continue, I would have said it louder until they stopped. Today, that wasn't an option. I saw the kids fighting, I walked up behind them and placed my hands gently on their shoulders. You should have seen the looks in their eyes. I didn't have to say a word.

I thought it was interesting how people follow my lead. I was serving breakfast and asking which piece of the oven pancake that the kids wanted by pointing. The boys would stop talking to communicate with my by pointing. they would use my language. I wonder how often my kids follow my cue and speak my language. In fact, that thought sort of frightens me sometimes.

In my home being silent was fine because people understood what I was doing. When I took one of my boys to the park, a stranger showed up with her daughter. She said Hi. I nodded. She asked how old my son was. I held up three three fingers. This conversation was getting awkward, so I just started ignoring her. That is not my style, and I felt terrible. I felt that I was being rude because I wasn't speaking to her. Then I thought for a moment. I have this terrible habit of thinking of what I'm going to say next while people are talking instead of actually listening to them. And then I spent time fuming internally as I seek for an opportunity to interject into a conversation. When I finally do get to say something I feel dumb because it should have been said a lot earlier in the conversation. I have this amazing ability to end conversations by saying something that doesn't quite fit in and causes everyone else to stop talking.

So I'm at the park feeling like I'm being rude, but thinking that in reality I am far more rude every day in my interactions with my friends. I need to learn how to really listen, but I'm always afraid that I'll be even more left out of conversations than usual. Bottom line is that I need work on my listening.

Another thing that I loved about today was the physical contact. I'm not a touchy person, but it's really hard to get someone's attention when you aren't talking. So when I needed to talk with my boys, I put a hand on them and they turned to me. When I was opening the oven and my sister-in-law was standing nearby, I put my hand on her back to let her know that I was about to burn the back of her knees. It wasn't a lot of contact, but it is a form of communication that I just don't use very often.

I did slip up a couple of times. The first one was sort of embarrassing. I was out on a bike ride and I had a hypothetical conversation that was going on in my head (please don't tell me that I'm the only one that has these conversations). The next thing I knew, I said something out loud. So if a guy who has a day of silence accidentally talks in the forest and nobody hears it, did he really talk?

This afternoon, my 3-year-old came in and started tickling my feet. I happen to be extremely ticklish, so I immediately asked him to KNOCK IT OFF and it was out loud. Then this evening, my wife was reading the boys a bed-time story and she made a comment and I started to respond.

I very much enjoyed the experience today. I don't think that I have the courage to do it regularly or on a day that I needed to work. (What would a potential employer say if you showed up and refused to talk, but rather wrote or acted out all of your responses? Next interview that I don't really want, I'm going to try it.) The video that started it all off, that guy found a job and taught college classes without speaking. He even walked from San Fransisco to Missoula to take the job and start going to school there. I wish I could do that, but I'm just not that guy.

My overall take on the experience: I missed talking to my wife. I felt rude not talking to people I encountered. I felt guilty talking to myself. I liked a lot of the silent communication with my children, but some words would have been good. I liked some physical communication.

This evening, my wife asked me what I thought of the day; how I thought it went. I gave her a thumbs up (I hate that gesture, it feels cheesy, but I used it a lot today). I then pointed at her to 'ask' what she thought. She said that she really liked it...

Decisions and money

2011-03-30T11:43:00.002-06:00

I really don't like looking for a job. I'm not an especially competitive person and I am way too honest for the resume and interview portions of the Job Application Pageant. Another problem is that I don't know exactly what I want to do.

I've spent years in the fitness industry, and I just don't feel like I fit there. I can do it. I even think I'm fairly good at it. I'm just not a fitness kind of guy. I don't really want to help anyone look good in a swimsuit, I think there are far greater concerns in the world that I would rather be working on.

So I've applied with health departments and alternative transportation organizations, but I haven't had any success. My lack of success is probably closely related to my lack of experience in those areas.

And then there's alternative building methods that really interests me. I have absolutely no experience and very little knowledge in that area. I called up a green building company to ask if they had any openings. They asked me if I had any experience. I said no. They asked about my education. I said that I had advanced degrees in exercise physiology. They asked what I thought I could do. I didn't have any idea... So I stammered around and said that I just wanted to do something. Oddly, they weren't looking for anyone at that point. I haven't called on green builders since then. I have tried to get into volunteering somewhere, but I really haven't found anyone who is willing to take me in.

So I'm sitting here, doing nothing and it's driving me nuts. OK, I'm not really doing nothing, but I'm not satisfied with what I'm getting done. I'm doing quite a bit of reading and I enjoy that. I've also started writing a book. So far it is terrible, but I still work on it because I feel that the premise has potential and it makes me feel like I'm doing something.

Oh, and I apply for jobs. I apply for jobs that I fear getting. I apply for jobs for which I'm terribly over qualified. I apply for jobs that I'm excited about. I apply for jobs that I hope I don't get. I apply for jobs that I don't think I could do. Sometimes it feels like a game because I just keep applying for jobs. I've had seven interviews in three months, so I don't feel like it's going that poorly, but I would like to be doing something more.

Here comes the big decision that weighs on me. We have money in savings and we could continue to live like this for another year or more as I continue to put in applications to various jobs (which would drive me nuts). Or, I've thought of starting a business. I've done it before, it's not that difficult. I mean it's not difficult except the making enough money to support your family part of starting a business. Starting the business is really easy.

What business would I like to start? I could make soap (except I doubt supporting a family on that income). I could start a pedicab company in a mid-sized town somewhere, except I fear the start-up cost and the ability to make money at it. I could start an alternative building company to help build houses for the poor (that really excites me), except I have no building experience, no equipment and the poor are generally not good at paying for things.

That seems to leave starting a fitness business. I could do it, I have confidence that I could make it a good business. I have confidence that I could support my family with it. I also have confidence that it would drive me nuts on many levels because the services that I think people need, are not the same as what they think they want.

I've been sending out some more unconventional propositions asking for exchanges and different approaches to saving money, starting a business or finding a job. I'm excited about that. I'm excited about unconventional. We'll see.

But for now, I'm going back to writing my book that needs a lot of work so that I can make my millions as an author.

Parable

2011-03-27T17:30:00.003-06:00

I just read a parable that I really liked.

A king went to a garden where he found two beautiful mango trees. One of the trees was heavily burdened with a wealth of fruit. The other tree was just as healthy and beautiful, but did not contain a single mango. The king enjoyed a mango and continued on his path.

When the people of the village saw the king eat the fruit of the mango tree, they took this as a sign that it was free for the taking. They climbed the tree and picked every piece of fruit from the tree. They tore off leaves, broke branches and otherwise pillaged the tree to make sure they removed every piece of fruit.

When the king returned to the garden, again he saw two large mango trees. The tree that had formerly born fruit was broken, unhealthy and otherwise looked scraggly. The tree that had never born fruit was still a large beautiful healthy tree.

The king empathized with the broken tree as he felt heavy laden with the burdens of the kingdom and wealth. He saw the hope in the freedom, liberty and health of the fruitless tree. The king then gave up his golden bowl of a king along with all of his other riches and power and replaced it with a clay bowl of an aesthetic monk.

What I miss

2011-03-18T21:21:00.002-06:00

So we've been living in our trailer for nearly 3 months now. When we left we sold a whole lot of stuff. At the time I was amazed at the quantity of stuff we were getting rid of it. I wondered what I would wish I still had.

Three months into the adventure, here is my thought. I miss my compost bin. Of course it would be sort of disgusting to haul around a container of rotting food waste, but it really bothers me having to throw away something that could be made into perfectly good dirt rather than sitting in a landfill, likely breaking down anaerobically contributing to global warming. As lame as it may seem, I wish I had a way to dispose of food waste.

I miss a freezer. When we had more space in the freezer, we would often make a large quantity of beans, jam or other freezable food and use them for weeks to come. This saved us money and produced far less trash than having to prepare meal sized proportions. As eco-unfriendly as it is, I wish I had a freezer.

I miss my daily bike ride to work. While I get out and play with the kids or do other stuff, I still often feel like a slug. I miss waking up every morning, going outside and getting on my bike and riding to work. I suppose I miss having a job to go to everyday, but that will take away from time with my family that I have been thoroughly enjoying. I will have to get out on my bike more often... or running, I like running. I think it's really sad that my irregular schedule has so drastically influenced my exercise routine. I'm still fairly active, but not as much as I would like to be.

I fear that I'm going to miss some of the tools that I sold, but am also looking forward to getting higher quality than I previously had. At this point I haven't needed them, but I foresee needing them again.

The last thing that I miss is space. The basement of our home was amazing. We could send the kids down there and they would play for hours and hours. The kind of play they did in the basement cause our poor little camper to shake and bounce like you can't believe. It is also very loud. I miss the basement... but I wouldn't give up the kids' close proximity for anything, not even for peace and quiet. (not most of the time anyway).

Quite frankly, I am amazed at how much stuff there is that I don't even really remember having. I remember the size of the garage sale that we had, but what in the world did we sell? We are doing just fine without it, so why in the world did we hold onto all that stuff for so many years?

I'm excited to settle again and have space, and moderate what we bring into our house. I'm excited to live with a lot less than what we had before.

Job interview

2011-02-24T20:04:00.002-07:00

I hate job interviews. It's not that I'm especially nervous, although I do get a little nervous. It's not that I mind sitting there being bombarded with questions. I just feel so judged. I'm talking and they are taking notes and missing half of what I say. Then I keep talking and they stop taking notes. Does that mean I'm no longer saying anything of value? And then I walk out of the interview and I think of all the things I could have said differently. And then I have the opportunity to stress over my responses and the responses that I could have given until I hear back from the prospective employer. So I'm waiting.

What really makes the waiting hard is that this is the position that I'm most excited about since I've been applying for jobs. It's in transportation instead of health. I like that idea. I like the Medford area. There is A LOT to do here. with big rivers, big mountains and all the outdoor recreation I could ever hope for. It's a bit further from family that I hoped for, but it is within a day's drive.

Here's the problem. They were interviewing 13 people for this position. That's a lot. Not that I feel that I can't compete, I really feel that I have the qualifications for the position and I feel that my interview went relatively well. So the problem isn't that I feel like there is too much competition, the problem is that the job is too desirable. There are at least 13 other people who would love to be doing this job.

I am scheduled for a job interview in Warm Springs on March 7th. Warm Springs is in Central Oregon and in the middle of nowhere. It's flat and desolate and there isn't much going on in that city. Warm Springs is 77% Native American according to citydata.com. It's really unfortunate that we chased all the natives out of this land and then went back and gave them the most hideous places in the country to call their own. That is a topic for another day. The closest city to the Warm Springs reservation is Madras. Madras is 50% white. I've never lived in a city where I was the minority (except that I'm always the minority on my bike... and the minority in other ways, but never a racial minority). On one hand, that makes me a little apprehensive, but I would also be excited to be able to experience being a minority and the culture of those around me. So, I'm not especially excited about Warm Springs as a location. It's different. I am, however excited about the job. It's working to promote healthy eating to a population in need.

Here it is, I'm finally going to get to the point that I was going to make. I was reading a book and the author (Shane Claiborne) recounted a story of a classmate of his that was chosen for a job out of 100+ people. She was excited and told one of her professors about the job that she got. The professor was disappointed and said that he really thought she would be the person who took the job that nobody else wanted. Sure it takes a lot of skills and experience to compete in the job market, but it takes a special kind of person to take those jobs that nobody really wants. I want to be that kind of person, but I often fear that I am not.

Taking off

2011-02-23T17:28:00.002-07:00

We took off. After being parked in my Sister-in-law's front yard for many weeks, we hooked up the camper and left yesterday. It's a crazy feeling. I keep asking my wife, "Did we remember the ____?" (and she asks me the same sort of questions). I packed three things into the van before we left: Two bikes and a big stroller (and my kids, they came too). I've never packed so little when leaving for several days. But I guess since I'm towing my house around with me, it's all there. We didn't forget anything. If we own it, it's with us. (we did leave a few things with my sister-in-law, but they were things that we were living without anyway).

I said that we were leaving for several days, that may be true or not. We left on Tuesday and I have a job interview on Thursday in Medford (Southern Oregon). It's a little further from the Seattle area than we were originally looking, but I'm more excited about this position than I have been about most. So the job interview is tomorrow and they will also be interviewing candidates on Friday and Monday. The successful candidate will be required to attend a training on Friday March 4th.

I guess that means that I brought my family on a week long vacation to Southern Oregon. But if I get the job, that means that I moved to Southern Oregon. Oh, and This morning I received another phone call offering me an interview on Monday the 7th. If I don't get the job in Southern Oregon, we will head directly to the interview in Central Oregon. And if I get that job, maybe I left Washington to move to Central Oregon... in a very round-about way.

I feel very free. We can go anywhere. Sure, we don't have an unlimited money supply, but we haven't started filing our bankruptcy papers either. Everywhere we go, our home follows us and we can stop and be home. In some ways, my wife and I are looking forward to a place of permanence (and a little more space), but for now, we're having a good time vacationing... or moving.

Spencer's book

2011-02-15T10:32:00.002-07:00

Spencer came to me and said he wanted to write a series of books. So he dictated and I typed. This is his story verbatim. I may have added punctuation since I think the story was one sentence. Other than that, this is Spencer's Story.

The Mystery of Dragon Cove by Spencer

One day, a man walked along a road. He found a friendly dragon. He decided to train it and make it his pet. And then one day he went out to feed it and he had ran out of food, so he went to the store to buy more. And the bag was bigger than the other bag so he had more food. Twice as big. And then he went to get the fish because it’s favorite food is fish and he fed it a ton of fish every day. And every year he gave him a ton of fish. And then he gave him shrimp for ten years and then he bought fish enough for ten years and then shrimp again. And then they went to the market and bought dragon treats for good dragons. And then they had a baby dragon and it was really strong. And then it dived out of its egg and flapped its wings, but it couldn’t fly yet, so it was too young. And then the older dragon gave them a ride and then another person followed them. And then another person and then another person until the entire country did it. And the entire country is doing it right now in Cherry Island. The End.

Day 1

2011-02-04T00:09:00.002-07:00

I felt like I made some renewed effort today and it really worked out quite well. I started the day with a short run. I like running. Not because I like running, but because it gives me an opportunity to think. And I like thinking while I'm running because it makes me slow down and that makes me less sore.

On my run, I thought about what I needed to do every day. I came up with a short list.

1) Play with my kids... do something with them. I especially like spending some one-on-one time with one of them because I think that is important to recognize them as an individual.

2) Serve someone. I have this free time. Sure, it would be nice to be gainfully employed, but I have time and I would really like to spend at least some of that time serving others. Today I helped my sister-in-law with some organization in the garage. I didn't get very far before I ran into a bathroom sink, cabinet and vanity that she wants installed. I think I have found my service for tomorrow as well.

3) Look for a job. My wife and I have a system for our job search. My wife does the searching, I do the applications. My wife cruises through the list of resources for finding jobs that I qualify for and that seem interesting and I fill out tedious applications and send in resumes and letters and jump through whatever hoops that particular organization wants me to jump through. I have the formal 'job search' under control, but I sometimes think of other dream jobs. I love thinking about sustainable housing and how to do that. I enjoy designing houses in my head with thoughts of reusing water, efficient heating and reusing materials to make the building. So today I decided to make one cold call each day to volunteer or ask for a job. Today I wrote to a guy who does green home design and home remodeling. I found a local company that was small and I wrote an email to the only email address provided on the website explaining that I didn't have any experience, but I was interested in a job. Or helping. Or something. The guy has actually already responded and we're working on a time next week to meet. I wonder who I will cold call tomorrow.

I don't know that I'm going to do each of those three things every day, but the idea is to fill my days with stuff rather than nothing. So far, so good. Today went really well.

Life

2011-02-02T13:42:00.002-07:00

I've blogged a lot lately about the job search and whatnot. I don't know that anyone is really interested in that. Today I'm going to blog a little about what life is like for us.

There are six of us living in a 30 foot camper. Do a little quick math and you get that we each get 5 linear feet of space, 40 square feet. Yes, it's a busy camper. It's certainly not as roomy as our 2000 square foot house, but I'm really enjoying it. Instead of having my family spread out over the house, each doing their own thing. We are doing more things together. It's hard not to because no matter where you sit, you're sitting with others. I can hear kids laughter (or screaming)at any time. We have been playing more games... and while I really don't enjoy playing 'war', I like sitting with my boys as we each turn over 1 card at a time and I listen to commentary.

In a house, it's easy to let messes accumulate and then avoid them. If your house is 240 square feet, you need every big of space available. to live. While a little more storage would be nice, I like having limited space because it forces me to keep things cleaned up because if it isn't cleaned up there is no place to do stuff (like sit or walk).

I also like having time with family. I know that won't last forever, because I really do need to get a job, but for now I like just having time. I also wish I used it better. There is a real temptation to simply let time pass until I get a job and I've been doing too much of that. I see the opportunity to do so much, but the temptation to do nothing is awkwardly attractive.

Some of my favorite things I've done thus far have been volunteering with a local soup kitchen. I spent an evening preparing food for the local homeless people. That was a great experience, but with my uncertain future, and job interview schedule, it's hard to promise them regular times like they want me to. I also enjoy hiking with my kids. Last week, I took my oldest for a hike in the woods not far from here and we came upon a canoe sitting next to a small lake. It was in the middle of nowhere. It was a weekday when people should be at work. So we borrowed the canoe and explored the lake. It was a lot of fun.

So... in this blog, I'm going to make a point of posting what I've been doing lately with my family or to keep myself busy. This is me providing myself accountability to assure that I get out and do stuff rather than letting time pass. And this afternoon I'm going to start running.

Lost

2011-02-02T13:19:00.002-07:00

The phone call came yesterday. I lost the competition. I didn't get the job at the Bike Alliance. I am OK with that. I have a bunch of other solid applications in that should start interviewing next week or the week after. There were a lot of things that I was skeptical about with the Bike Alliance job so that it just didn't feel right and I really felt that if I did get that job, I would turn it down.

No need to turn it down, I didn't get it.

As I apply for jobs, I find it interesting the level of effort I put into different applications. I put a lot of effort into the Bike Alliance job because it was a very desirable job for me. I have also applied for jobs that seem like something that I might enjoy, but they just aren't worth putting a bunch of time into. So I don't. Yesterday I received a call to tell me I didn't get the Bike Alliance job, I also received emails that said I did not get two other jobs. One was doing asthma prevention with the city of Portland and the other was at a community college that trained nurses teaching anatomy, physiology and nutrition. I didn't put a lot of effort into those applications because I while I was qualified for the jobs and they paid well enough, I wasn't really interested in having the jobs. Teaching in a college setting, is not my thing and I think that job would have been terrible for me. The Asthma job is along the lines of what I'm looking for doing public health type stuff at a city level. It's just that Asthma really isn't my area of expertise.

The jobs that I'm really excited coming up are with the YMCA. I have applied in Marysville (I'm the least excited about that position), Silverdale and Seattle. I enjoyed working for the Y and would like to return to that. I am very well qualified for those positions, but my fear is that they will be taken by someone internal. We'll see.

I'm also excited about jobs with Kaiser and BNSF. I don't know that they are dream jobs, but there is a lot going for them. Both of those jobs paid really well. I just don't know that I want to be in the for-profit sector. That's not really my thing... I don't think.

Oh and I applied for a job with an extension office teaching nutrition and gardening in rural Oregon. I'm REALLY excited about that job. It doesn't pay much, but I have a hunch that it doesn't cost much to live there either. I'm really excited about the job itself and the location.

So many options... It's exciting to think about the future. Until then... I need to work on taxes.

Competition

2011-01-27T13:43:00.002-07:00

I had a second interview with a job that I was interested in. I blogged a bit about this before. This being the first job interview that I've gotten, if I make it through this final round of interviews, I would still have a lot of irons in the fire if the offer comes.

As I drove up to Seattle for the interview yesterday, I was thinking that this isn't the job that I want. It deals with cycling. It pays well (although I did find that health insurance isn't covered and that cuts deeply into the pay). It's a topic that I'm passionate about and I think that it could be fun (although expensive) to live in a downtown area for a couple of years. It is also sort of nice because it is only a 2-year position... since my pattern has thus far been to move every couple of years. There is also a lot that this job would not let me do. I would not be able to commute to work by bike (Ironic, huh). We certainly wouldn't be able to put much into savings with the given salary. And I don't know that it would be the best career move.

Anyway, As I drove up yesterday, I was thinking of how I didn't think the job payed enough (I had assumed that I would have to pay for mileage, but that is reimbursed and that would make a HUGE difference). I had in my mind that I was going to sort of back out of the offer because I don't think it was the best option for me. I was going to use the excuse of costs associated with the job as a reason to back out. But it didn't turn out that way. I still think that I want to keep looking. I don't think I should take the first job offered me... and I have some other prospects that I'm really excited about (but they are far from offering me a job).

Did you really read all that? Frankly it wasn't the full truth. The reality is that I think I had to stay in the running for this job because I'm competitive. I made it to the final four. I can't pull out right before they make the final decision. I don't think it is fair to them for me to stay in with no intention of taking the position (and maybe I would take the position). Anyway... I have a fear that part of the reason that I'm still in the running is because I'm competitive and I can't quit when I really should.

I've got some other job options that I'm excited about. I would really like to stay with the Y, but those interviews don't start until mid February. And there are some government jobs that I'm excited about, but it's hard to say how long those will take.

Thoughts

2011-01-25T23:44:00.002-07:00

I found this and it's been very much what I've been thinking about.

"To be whole, let yourself break.
To be straight, let yourself bend.
To be full, let yourself be empty.
To be new, let yourself wear out.
To have everything, give everything up.

Knowing others is a kind of knowledge;
knowing yourself is wisdom.
Conquering others requires strength;
conquering yourself is true power.
To realize that you have enough is true wealth.
Pushing ahead may succeed,
but staying put brings endurance.
Die without perishing, and find the eternal.

To know that you do not know is strength.
Not knowing that you do not know is a sickness.
The cure begins with the recognition of the sickness.

Knowing what is permanent: enlightenment.
Not knowing what is permanent: disaster.
Knowing what is permanent opens the mind.
Open mind, open heart.
Open heart, magnanimity."
Laozi's Tao Te Ching

Actually the poem was a response to this video, which is one of the best TED talks I've ever seen. And yet still I fear making myself vulnerable.

The hard part

2011-01-13T22:03:00.002-07:00

There is a lot that I don't like about looking for a job, but also a lot that I like about it. I just need to get it off my chest. I can't stand that every place you apply requires you to fill out this tedious form that requires that you input your work history and job history into a form. Then they have the nerve to ask for my resume. Do they not know that all that information is on my resume? Thanks, I feel a lot better now and I'll stop complaining about the mundane things that I just don't like doing.

What I love about looking for a job is the opportunity to dream about a new future. Dream about a new direction in life and dream of great outcomes. That brings me to another part that is difficult. It's not that I don't like this aspect, it's just that it's a challenge. I struggle to think of choosing between jobs. (See, I like to dream... I dream of multiple job offers... I dream of employers fighting over me as if I was the solution to all of their problems.)

I have my first interview next week. In many aspects it's a dream job. It is a temporary position for 2 years, working on a grant to promote cycling as a form of transportation. It's a project manager type position. I would be teaching bike safety, building collaborations with other community members and working to promote cycling. I think it would be an awesome job. The pay is reasonable, except the job is in downtown Seattle. Seattle is a great city and I think that I would like the cultural opportunities for me and the kids. I would also like being involved with the cycling community. I just know that living in Seattle is expensive and while this job pays more than I previously made, I didn't used to live in Seattle.

But then I think of the other jobs that I've applied for. While I think that the job in Seattle is something I would enjoy, I don't know that it is the right step for my career. I've never done anything (career wise) in cycling. Would it be like a 2 year hiatus from my area of focus or would it provide me with new and improved skills that would expand my opportunities. I wonder.

The jobs that I've applied for with the state government, Universities or Kaiser seem to be better steps for my career. They would better put to use my knowledge of human physiology and nutrition and I think they would better prepare me for more health promotion/public health type jobs. And I think that is the direction I would like to go. These are the jobs I have been preparing for with my education and career experience. They are dream jobs, but not in my favorite hobby that I've been passionate about for years.

And then there is the pay. Some of the other jobs that I applied for pay more than the job in Seattle (some pay 70% more), and they are located in areas where the cost of living is lower than it is in Seattle. One of our goals is to be free of all debt, and that wouldn't be possible in Seattle and it might be with some of the other jobs that I applied for. When I look at it with some of my bigger picture goals and longer term goals, I seem to feel that the Seattle job is less than perfect (although still very close to my dream job in many ways).

Here comes the real hard part. If I were offered a job in Seattle, would I take it? Is it really the best opportunity? Or would it be the only position that would even offer me a job (or an interview)? All the excitement, and all the worry all rolled up into one. I'm excited to see where I end up.

Selling everything

2011-01-07T23:54:00.003-07:00

Before we moved out west, we sold just about everything we owned. We went from a 2000+ square foot house to a 8x30 trailer. Everything that we kept fit inside the trailer and the van that pulls it. With that said, I will be honest and say that we do have a few things that we removed from the van and camper and have stored temporarily in my sister-in-law's garage. We just don't want to have to trip over some stuff every day.

I tell people that we did this and they ask why, or they are 'sorry' that we had to sell our stuff. Honestly, selling our stuff was something we look forward to long before we had the big sale. I want to take the opportunity to explain what it is like.

To start, my wife and I have walked through our house on numerous occasions looking for the stuff we thought we could do without. We were sometimes able to get rid of a few things, but indefinitely we would justify most of the stuff that we had in our house because it was a convenience item or because we might need it sometime. When we decided to have a HUGE garage sale and sell most of our stuff, it was fairly easy to walk around and say that we were going to get rid of a bunch of stuff. It was easy to put prices on things and it was fairly easy to take someone's money and watch them walk away with what used to be ours. There just wasn't much that I was really attached to.

When the garage sale was over, the hard part began. There we were, mentally ready to go, but with a house full of stuff that we needed to get rid of. These were things that had value to us. These were items that we had used regularly for years. Nobody bought them at the garage sale, so it left us in a position where we either needed to try again to sell it, or give it away. That was the hard part, putting forth more effort to sell stuff or giving it away.

I'm going to take a little step back and say that it wasn't difficult to give stuff away. From the very beginning we had a pile of give away stuff. It wasn't hard to take the things we had set aside for a good cause to the homeless shelter. That actually felt really good. The hard part was the stuff that we intended to sell. These were items that were not really going to provide someone with a basic life essential. It was just stuff. Stuff people pay for. Stuff that I would now have to give to a charitable organization who would then sell it to make money. I wanted that money.

It was hard because I saw the value in stuff that I was giving away and I saw that someone else was going to reap the benefits of the value. But it was also hard because we just wanted to be through. We wanted the house to be empty and clean (and sold would be good too). We wanted to move onto the next step in the process.

When I left our house, there was still a pile of stuff in the garage for people to come and pick up. Habitat for Humanity was going to get some of it and a friend was going to take the rest. I really wish that had been taken care of long before we left rather than having to be left in the garage.

Now it's a few weeks later. I can't think of a single item that I miss. My wife regrets getting rid of The Chronicles of Narnia, but we'll be able to get those again at a library or used somewhere. I also think that we will miss our couch and love seat. It was Amish built and it was exactly what I like in living room furniture. It will be very expensive to replace (we bought it from Habitat for Humanity and got a really good deal on it). I don't think that the living room furniture can be considered a regret, because there really wasn't a way for us to keep it, but there will be a time in the future that I wish I had those back. Just like I think back at once owning a VW Thing. I wish I still had that Thing.

So far, life with less stuff has been a wonderful experience. I played Scrabble with my kids and my wife this evening. We read more often together. I think it has been really good for us. When I think of getting a new place, I am afraid of getting something too big. I like having my family close where I can be with them as they talk to themselves to sleep, I can hear them sleep. I can hear them stir. I can be the first to tell them 'good morning' when they wake up. So far, so good. I look forward to more experiences with my family. I feel richer than I have ever been. I wonder what my kids will remember when they are my age.

The job search

2011-01-03T22:20:00.000-07:00

I am currently looking for a job. I knew that was part of leaving Kentucky, I knew that I would have to find a new job in the Northwest. I even knew that the job market wasn’t great. What I forgot to calculate into the equation is that I am over educated with a degree that can’t get you a job in any field.

My training is in Exercise Physiology and Health Promotion. I chose the field because I like the approach of the discipline. Instead of specializing in part of the body, Exercise Science looks at the body as a whole. The medical world is getting more and more specialized; you have a doctor for your feet, another for your ear nose and throat, and another for your endocrine system, etc. The field of exercise science is one of the few that still looks at a body as a whole. It looks at the endocrine, renal, and thermal regulatory responses to exercise (and at rest, and fasting, and after eating, and in a diseased state, etc).

Most people, when they think of exercise science, first think of either sports or personal training. I didn’t go into the field for either reason. I am in exercise science because I like the broad base that it gives me to help people achieve health. In my studies, I branched out a little to look at overall health through the lens of civil engineering, public policy, and public health. I wanted to understand why people make the decisions that they do, and what can be done in the planning, design or prevention realm to help people be healthier.

So here I am, I have a master’s degree and have finished all but my dissertation in exercise science. While working on my PhD, I was also working toward a minor in public health. I have a very good understanding of how the body works and how to make it healthy. I have some background in public policy and civil engineering and I have a little exposure to the public process to make changes.

When I think philosophically about education, I feel that I have been very well educated and should be a top candidate for a large variety of needed positions.

Unfortunately, that is not the case. As I look at job announcements, the positions that interest me. The positions that I feel I would be really good at all require a nursing, dietetics or public health degree. I have quite a bit of education in all of those fields, but the letters that I have behind my name are BS, MS, and ABD. I don’t have an RN, RD or MPH, so I therefore don’t qualify for the jobs that interest me.

When applying for a job, they have a list of ‘required qualifications’ and if you don’t have those, they won’t consider you further. I think that there should be a way for me to submit my qualifications that would magnify my different perspective. I think that I have the experience and expertise to do well at a large variety of jobs, but my education hasn’t provided me what I need to get the jobs. I don’t have the right letters behind my name.

As I look at options, I wonder. Would it be more productive to go back to school and get an MPH, RN or PT degree? After 8 and a half years of formal education, returning to school isn’t overly appealing, but I fear that those 8.5 years have been a total waste, so a few more years might actually qualify me to get a job. The ultimate frustration is that I feel qualified to do a whole lot. I even feel qualified to do a whole lot that is greatly needed in our society, yet I don’t qualify for the available jobs.

Home again

2010-12-23T22:16:00.002-07:00

From the top of Grapevine Hill, we drove to Medford Oregon. There was some fear of bad weather, but really the weather was perfect. We had some heavy rain in LA, but we didn't encounter any snow and I even made it through the entire state of Oregon without any rain. There was a little rain in Washington, but that is to be expected. It wouldn't be home without it.

So we arrived safely. I didn't really keep track, but we went 3000+ miles in 6.5 days of driving. Not a spectacular rate, but with a stop at Grandma's house to play in the pool and the bladders of two kids under 8, I am happy with how quickly we got here. And we are here for Christmas. Two months ago, I would have said with a fair amount of confidence that I would be in Lexington for Christmas, but here I am.

We have the camper all set up in my Sister-in-law's drive way. I feel intrusive. While we are self-contained, we sort of take up the entirety of the driveway. And if we visit, we overtake the entire house. I greatly appreciate their hospitality, but pray that we can maintain some appropriate distance.

Dating and Ballets

2010-12-23T22:14:00.000-07:00

Today we drove from Phoenix Arizona to just above Grapevine Hill north of LA. On the drive, I put in some old tapes that brought back memories. It amazed me how vivid the feelings returned. I’m not talking about high school, I’m talking about 4^th grade.

In 4^th grade, Wendy Page (or was it Wendi Paige?) lip-synced ‘Straight-up’ by Paula Abdul at a talent show. I totally had a crush on Wendy and her performance was spectacular. I can still remember quite vividly how I felt watching the song and all of those feelings come right back when I hear the song. I don’t want to be misunderstood; I haven’t seen Wendy in at least 20 years and if I did see her, I wouldn’t recognize her. But I certainly remember the feeling of being completely infatuated with a girl.

Also at that talent show, Cheryl Weaver asked me to go out with her. I also had a crush on Cheryl (a guy really can’t have too many crushes in 4^th grade). Cheryl went to the same bus stop as I did. I would make sure to get to the bus stop as early as possible every day so that I could spend time with Cheryl. I would wait at the bus stop for a long time, eagerly anticipating being able to stand around and talk with Cheryl.

At the 4^th grade talent show, Cheryl worked up the courage and asked me to go out with her. Really this made a lot of sense since we both had crushes on each other and had lots of opportunities to hang out together and do whatever dating 4^th graders do.

Not only did Cheryl ask me out, she didn’t do it through a friend, she did it in person, face to face. I remember how excited I was at all of the opportunities and the realization of my dreams. And then I said, “no”. Not only did I say no, but I said it in a tone of voice that said, “no way, why in the world would you ask me that?”

A few minutes after I said no, her friends came and asked me, ”So, what did you say?” I told them that I told her no. Then they asked why… I don’t remember what I said. I don’t have any good reason to having said no. On one hand, this is a major regret in my life. My actions contradicted my true feelings. Every time I hear that Paula Abdul song, I feel those feelings of complete infatuation and the feelings of regret and denying my true feelings.

At the same time, I look back at that event and think of how different my life would have been had I started dating in 4^th grade. I wonder if I would still have ended up with the wife that I have. In that regard, I am extremely happy that I said no. There is no other woman that I would ever want to be married to. My wife is really the woman of my dreams.

Also, I think of a kite ballet in which I participated. I flew a kite to the music of Paula Abdul. I won. That was a monumental moment in my life. (not really).

So those were my thoughts as I drove through the desert between Phoenix and LA. I had these great plans of how to get through LA. I was going to stop at a rest area or truck stop and sleep for a few hours before heading through LA at about 9pm. Evidently I missed the last rest area. I entered LA at 4pm. I got out the other side of LA at 7pm. I will number that as something that I have now accomplished and never have to do again. I have driven a 15-passenger van pulling a 30-foot trailer through rush hour LA traffic. My life is now full.

12/20/10

2010-12-20T18:29:00.003-07:00

Las Cruces to Phoenix. It's getting harder and harder to post stuff because all we do is drive. I don't think. I sit and I listen to music. I entertain kids and I keep the van and trailer between the appropriate lines. Hour after hour, mile after mile. I drive. I hate driving. I hate sitting and doing nothing. I'm ready to be at my destination and get out a bit and leave the van at home.

I can share a little of drama for the trip. Before we left, we had some electrical issues, but I took care of them (after hours and hours of looking around and fixing stuff, I replaced the battery and it worked). On Friday night the battery was charged and it powered the heater all night Friday night. On Saturday we did the same thing, except when we woke up on Sunday morning it was very cold in the camper and none of the lights worked (dead battery).

Automotive problem... I do what I always do, call my dad. He suggested a blown fuse and gave me a few to look at to see if they were blown. I checked and they were all good. He said that he would look further into it. He called back later and gave me a few more to look at (as I think back on it, I think he may have just had me check all the rest). This time I found a blown fuse.

I had found the problem, now all I had to do was find a 40 Amp fuse and replace it. We stopped by the first store we came across and they didn't have anything automotive. I then stopped at the next gas station/convenience store and they did not have any fuses. Finally I stopped by a place that had fuses, a Flying J, but they didn't have any 40 Amp fuses. So I bought a 30 Amp fuse because I figured that it might blow, but it certainly wouldn't do any damage. We drove a bit further that night and when we got to our destination I went back to the camper and the lights worked. Problem solved.

When I woke up Monday morning, the lights didn't work and it was rather cold (although we were far enough south that the low was 48 so we really weren't suffering). I checked the fuse and it had not blown, but I opted to replace it with a 40 Amp fuse anyway.

We had stayed the night in a Wal Mart parking lot (the only thing that Wal Mart is good for) so I checked to see if they had a 40Amp fuse. They did, but it came in a set and was going to cost me $20 and would come with $17 worth of fuses that I didn't need and would probably never use. I decided to keep looking. At 6:50 am I asked a Wal Mart customer where the nearest auto parts store would be. He directed me to turn left and go aways and it would be on my left. I decided it would be a good time to go for a run. After running for about a mile, it looked like I was about to run into the desert. I didn't figure I would find an auto part store in the desert, so I turned around. On the way back I asked more people about where I would find an auto part store.

Finally I found the right guy and he told me where to go. I went and spent $3 for a fuse. The electrical has been working all day. I like to think that the battery is fully charged and that everything is working as it aught to, but really, I've thought that before. Tonight I'm plugged into an electrical socket, so I won't really know. But by the time I get to where it really matters, I will find out whether my electrical is working or not.

Sometimes I like to think that this is preparation for building a house that would easily run off of simple 12 volt electric and run off of solar and wind power. A 12 volt house would lack some very helpful appliances, but I think about that sometimes. I think it would be easier to make a 12 volt system off the grid than making a 110 volt system off the grid.

12-19-10

2010-12-20T18:27:00.001-07:00

Today we drove from Dallas to Las Cruces New Mexico. Texas is an enormous state and when you are driving a giant cinderblock into a stiff headwind, you don’t get very good gas mileage.

I have a really bad habit. See, I have always tried to ride my bike most places and while on a bicycle it is easy to make fun of those people in behemoth automobiles that get less than 10 miles per gallon. Now, as I drive across the country getting well less than 10 mpg (the headwind was bad, but with no wind I can get really close to 10) and I will look at the macho guys in the huge pickups that clearly get terrible gas mileage and I will make a comment. It’s kind of like the pot calling the kettle black. I have ideals that include me not driving, but have been unable to put those ideals into practice. That is something that I would like to do as I start with my new identity.

We have been looking a bit at weather and it has been nearly perfect; Sunny and warm all day today! The only problem is that I’m ready for spring or summer and winter hasn’t even begun yet. I’m also looking toward the next few travel days and I see that California is having loads of rain and there are places with snow that I will have to go through. We’ll have to figure that out.

We decided to take the southern route (the long way) to avoid snow, but it is also going to give us a chance to stop by and visit my mom. If all goes well, we should be there early tomorrow afternoon.

I’ve been very happy with the way the camper has operated. Yesterday we managed to blow a fuse in the van that leads to recharging the battery on the camper. We discovered that this morning when everything in the camper died and it was really cold in the camper. It took the day to figure out what happened and to find a part to fix it. Truck stops are not the best place to go part shopping, they have a very limited supply.

Off to Arizona tomorrow.

Heading West

2010-12-20T18:25:00.000-07:00

I haven’t been blogging as much as I had hoped, but I sort of anticipated that because I have been driving… a lot. I’m feeling a lot less ‘sansauto’ than I used to be.

We took off from Lexington Kentucky on Friday afternoon at about 5pm. I’m not completely sure whose idea it was to leave at rush hour on the first day of winter vacation, but we left and the roads were busy. The drive was pretty uneventful and we made it to just outside of Nashville on Friday night. I told myself that I wasn’t going to stop until there was no snow on the side of the road and I didn’t.

The trailer worked great. We were able to sleep in it and there was sufficient battery power to keep the heater on all night. That surprised me a little, but we’ll call it a pleasant surprise.

We woke up early on Saturday morning and started driving. We drove all day. We ate in the trailer and everything worked exceptionally well.

I went to lunch with a good friend before leaving Lexington and as I told him of our adventure, he suggested that I should read some Thoreau. It just so happened that I had Walden as a book on tape (or at least an abbreviated version of it), so I listened to it.

I’m generally not one to argue with prominent authors, but I don’t know that I completely agreed with Thoreau on a few really big points. Of course I love his idea of moving to the woods, building a house with my own hands and living off the land for a couple of years (or forever), but I was still able to find that I have a substantially different view. Thoreau said that he wanted to live on his own to gain a sense of freedom and as part of his pursuit of ‘living simply and sucking the marrow out of live’ (That is paraphrased because I can’t look it up since it was an audio tape).

I’ve read that before and agreed with it. There is some beauty in living alone with your thoughts and having the opportunity to sit and think and contemplate without interruption. It’s great thought, especially if you are alone, but really the marrow of my life is found in others. It is found in my family and in the community that I long for. We live in the most industrialized country where we rely on one another for everything, yet I have met more people than I can count that are lonely and longing for deeper relationships with others.

Moving is an opportunity to start fresh with a new identity. I am going to do better and building deeper relationships with those around me.

On Saturday we drove a long ways until we ended up outside of Dallas Texas. Here are a couple of random observations from the drive.

1) Spencer snores… and if Spencer takes a 4 hour nap it really messes up his sleeping schedule

2) Arkansas has the worst maintained roads I have ever experienced

3) Arkansas has the least creative names for cities that I’ve ever heard. Texarkana was a bit weird, but I get it, it’s on the Texas Arkansas border. But what is up with Arkadelphia?

4) It is going to take a LONG time to cross Texas.

5) WiFi costs money and I’m too cheap to pay it so I have no idea when this will be posted.

We’re having a great time and moving west.

Irony

2010-12-16T21:30:00.002-07:00

Well, I am going to make the subject of this blog a little different for awhile. We've been going car light for quite some time and have really enjoyed that. Recently we bought a really big van and travel trailer for it to pull. SO I've gone from riding my bike everywhere to embarking on a journey across the country in a vehicle that gets gas mileage that I can count on my hands. I'm just hoping that it will take both hands to count it.

A little over a month ago, it became abundantly clear that we needed to be closer to family. Family is on the other side of the country and that is where we need to be. Timing is always hard, so we decided that we needed to do it soon. We bought the travel trailer in an effort to down-size.

It was an interesting experience. I am always tempted to use words like rewarding, interesting, or fun to describe it, but that neglects to mention that it was difficult. We sold or gave away everything that wouldn't fit into the travel trailer (and it is packed pretty much to live in, not to haul stuff). It was an eye opening experience. We've always tried to live simply. We've walked through the house numerous times looking to get rid of stuff that we didn't need. In the end we were always able to justify a bunch of stuff and we keep getting more. To make it fit into a 30 foot travel trailer meant really prioritizing and finding what is important in life.

We found that creative toys for the kids, games to play as a family and active recreational activities were our priorities. Everything that we kept revolved around those three things. Oh, and we kept kitchen stuff and clothes just because.

I think it is interesting. When I tell people what we're doing, I get a variety of responses. Some people are excited and express that they always wished they had the guts to do what we're doing. I like those people, they make me feel good. Some people think we're nuts and try to convince me to think the same thing. Sometimes I do think that it wasn't the most logical choice, but I personally don't believe that life is about making the choices that lead you safely to death. Life is about making choices that challenge you and allow opportunities to grow and learn about yourself and your fellowman.

I've also noticed that a lot of people think that we're poor. With the current economic conditions and all, they think that we've run out of money so as a last resort, we are selling the house and going to live with family. Yes, we're selling the house and going to live near family, but it's not because we're poor. It's because we want to add richness to our lives. We want to be closer as a nuclear family and we want to be closer to our extended family. I feel that we are in really good shape financially. Currently our only outstanding debt is the mortgage on our house so when the house sells we will be debt free. We also have the savings to pay our mortgage for a year or more while we wait for our house to sell (although we really don't want to use our savings for that purpose). We aren't making this move because we're poor, we're making this move to become rich.

I hope to blog regularly on the trip and I've also thought of writing a book about the experience, but I don't know that I want to put that much work into something I don't think anyone would want to buy.

So today we leave. I'm leaving a place where I've been able to commute almost everywhere by bike and I'm moving into a van pulling a camper. And here I am continuing to blog on 'sansauto' when currently my life is revolving around the auto. In the long run I really hope my car disappears all together.

Moby and Midget Moby

2010-11-01T18:27:00.002-06:00

So, we sold our van and got a bigger van. It's all part of the environmentalist in me. It may seem backwards (and maybe it is), but the bigger van is going to be the solution to a lot of things for us.

First lets talk about the old van. The old van was a mini-van that got OK gas mileage. We got a great deal on it and it was a great car for us. But when we wanted to go camping or take a hypothetical friend for a ride, we didn't have room. What it really boiled down to was that the mini-van did everything we needed to around town (where we really wanted to be riding a bike), but it wasn't big enough to do the stuff that we really wanted to use a car for, like go on weekend vacations.

So we bought a new van. It's big. We've decided to call it Moby... you know, like the big white whale. It's a 15 passenger (except it's missing a back seat, so it only holds 11) with a V10 that gets terrible gas mileage. We took it camping the first weekend that we had it and it was great. When we got to the camp site, I asked my wife why we hadn't been camping for so long and she said, "because we wouldn't fit in the car". Problem solved.

The new van is fantastic for longer trips, but around town the gas mileage gets even worse. This provides a great disincentive for driving around town. It's just that with four kids, it is hard to find a safe alternative.

Then we found a bike for sale that will safely haul our 4 kids. We bought one. We call it Midget Moby (or Midge for short). She rides like a dream... except when the kids get coordinated and lean violently from side to side; that makes it hard to steer straight. Except the boys say that Midge needs a bigger engine so it will go faster. We're still working on that. Here's a look at our new bike

Now I just need to find a plaid hat.

Time Trials

2010-08-08T12:33:00.002-06:00

I'm just going to get right to the point. I don't like time trials. I have never liked time trials. The irony is that I often dream of time trials and live my life like a time trials.

Time trials are bike races where you don't get to work with anyone. They send cyclists out one at a time so they can't draft or otherwise see how the others are doing. The only thing that matters in a time trial is the clock and each rider is racing against it.

I have done many time trials in my time as a cyclist. I'm not good at them. I always start with a goal and I generally have a goal that is realistic for me... or so I think. I leave the start line at a pace that will get me to my goal. I feel good about it and I push hard. About the time I am out of view of the start line I start feeling like I'm pushing hard into the wind and my legs start getting heavy. For some reason I think that I'm the only one that feels this way so instead of pushing through it, I slow down. I also tend to think that since I'm away from the start line and the spectators nobody will notice that I've slowed a little.

Pretty soon I convince myself that the headwind is really strong so I slow down a little more figuring that I'll make the time up when the course changes direction and I'll have a massive tailwind. The next thing I know, I'm riding along at a leisurely pace and I realize that I'm not breathing hard. As a physiology major, I know that breathing is how the body gets rid of the acidity of lactic acid. It doesn't take me long to realize that I've slowed down to a pace just slightly slower than a lollygag. At which point I speed up, but I never find a good pace that I can maintain.

My time trials generally tend to turn into interval workouts where the high intensity efforts are reserved (because I think I've found a pace I can sustain) and really slow rest periods (because I've convinced myself of a headwind or hill or being sick or something). I do tend to finish my time trials with gusto. I generally have a pretty good sprint at the end because I haven't expended that much energy on the race. Inevitably, my times are terrible.

I remember the one and only one time trial where I did well. It was 1.5 miles long (I never lost sight of either the start or finish line) and it was uphill (I'm good at hills). Out of the several hundred people that did the race that day, I was in the top 20. This was my kind of race, I hardly consider myself a short distance person, but it was short enough for me to maintain focus and my climbing skills helped a little.

Yesterday when I was out for a ride, I was thinking of racing again (I'm only 2 years away from racing with the masters). As I'm thinking, of course I dream of the glory of winning a bike race. In my thoughts I think of riding away from a group and riding on my own for an extended period of time to victory. What makes me think that I could maintain a strenuous effort when I've never been able to before? What makes me think that I could maintain the training schedule that I've never before been able to maintain?

Sometimes I use the same tactics in life as I do in cycling. I set myself up with a work schedule that I think will get me ahead, but then start seeing that it's not as sustainable as I first thought it was. Then I start making up excuses on why I slowed down as I consider an unknown future where everything will be easier. Sometimes I feel like I'm at a good pace, but most of the time I either feel like I'm at the redline or like I'm lollygagging from project to project. Overall, I don't feel like I'm finishing the race at the pace I am capable of going. I seem to never be satisfied with my performance.

The Story of Della

2010-07-18T19:22:00.002-06:00

We lost most of our chickens to raccoons several weeks ago. I fortified the coop and the hen house. I am fairly confident now that the raccoons can't get them. So we went and bought some more chickens.

We found this guy on Craig's-list that was selling hens. We set an appointment and drove up to his house one morning. I asked all the right questions. I established that I wanted the chickens, but I didn't want the turkeys. I was assured that I was getting all hens so that I would have more eggs and no crowing. I got a variety of chickens and then the guy offered to show us around his place. He had a variety of chickens. And then he showed us the ducks. My boys were excited about the ducks and I was too. I didn't want to jump into anything so I asked what ducks eat. He said they eat chicken food and don't have any special needs except for more water. He didn't even have a pond for his duck.

So I bought the duck. And my boys named the duck Della. The duck was bigger than the chicks that I bought, so I put it outside with the older chickens.

I put my blood sweat and tears into training that duck. After 3 days it was able to climb the ramp into the hen house all by itself. Also by that time the duck began to think that the chickens were its parents. It followed the chickens everywhere and the chickens pretended to ignore the duck. It was actually quite comical to watch the duck follow the chickens around thinking that it was a chicken.

Then someone asked me why I bought the duck. 'Does it lay eggs?' he asked. I thought for a moment. I didn't know if the duck was a girl. I asked all the right questions about the chickens, but I didn't know about the duck. That's OK though, because ducks don't crow.

I built the duck a very small pond (that it could get in to, but not out of) and it seemed to like it (probably because it couldn't get out). Unfortunately the pond I built did not quench the ducks desire for water. Every night the duck would take the water in the hen house and mix it around with the straw and make one awful mess. When the duck was smaller, it didn't get enough water to really matter, but as the duck got bigger, so did the mess.

Eventually it got to the point where I had to replace the bedding in the hen house every day. Every morning there was a small puddle of mud and chicken poop that I had to clean up. It didn't take long for me to get sick of cleaning the chicken coop. Once every week or two with a bunch of chickens. Daily with a single duck.

I decided I needed to get rid of Della. Although she was a meat duck, I couldn't do that. I thought of taking her back, but the guy we bought the duck from really didn't take great care of his animals and I didn't feel that was right either. Finally I decided to take her to the park. I put Della in a box and me and the boys released Della at the park to play with her duck friends for the rest of her life.

Unfortunately, Dell is a duck that will never fly. She weighs too much and has really small wings. So her only defense from predators is missing. I find it odd that I realize the reality of what I did, but I can find some comfort in riding my bike by the park and seeing white ducks. I will never know what happened to Della, but she will live out her days (or years?) at the park. And I will be able to ride by that park and see white ducks forever. So I guess Della will always be alive.

How do we ruin our children?

2010-06-28T19:55:00.002-06:00

A few minutes ago I was sitting on the bed, making sure my 6-month-old didn't crawl off. OK, maybe crawl is the wrong word. He wiggles and squirms and otherwise moves and sort of makes progress in a direction either toward what interests him, or in the exact opposite direction. It's always unfortunate when your gyrations don't lead you toward your goal. Today was a good day, he was progressing toward his goal.

It amazed me how he would wiggle and squirm with all his might until he got closer to his goal. Children have an unrelenting persistence. So, the kid would move closer to the edge of the bed (that was his goal as far as I could tell), and I would pull him back to the middle. Then he would wiggle his way to the edge again. Over and over again, that kid would put his all into moving to the edge of the bed. Over and over again, I would pull him back to the center. Really, it was in his best interest. It's amazing to think of the perseverance that it takes to learn to walk, talk, socialize and otherwise grow up. Think of the set-backs that this kid will experience. Imagine how many times he will fall, fail to communicate, socialize or otherwise live a 'perfect' life.

Yesterday my wife was helping the 4-year-old ride his bike for the first time without training wheels. He crashed. He crashed numerous times. He crashed in the grass. He crashed on concrete. He even crashed into the van once. Each time he shed a few tears and jumped up with a huge grin to do it again. Some day he will ride a bike without training wheels and will go off jumps, dodge obstacles and do other stunts that his father thinks are a bad idea.

Give them 20 years and they will be typical adults. (At least we're hoping for typical in some ways... in other ways we're praying that they will be anything but typical). If they are anything like me they will grow up to have fears and anxiety. Fears of failure and fears of success. Fears to try things because of what others might think. Fears that prevent them from being genuine. I find it interesting that many of my greatest fears are the things that make children progress so quickly. The things that I fear most are the things that I feel that I need to protect my children from.

Maybe instead of protecting, I should follow their lead? ... I'm too afraid to try.

Watermelon

2010-06-15T19:45:00.002-06:00

Generally my blog posts come from a fleeting thought. I get a little idea, I sit down and write about it and I hit the post button and hope for the best. Today is a topic more near and dear to my heart. This is a thought I have pondered for years and never had the courage to express. I believe that others may have other views and I quite frankly think they are wrong.

I am going to address the preparation, presentation and consumption of watermelon. First off, I think that this issue is drastically under-discussed. Watermelon is, without exception, the greatest food available to man. When prepared, presented and eaten properly, watermelon is the most divine of foods. If the preparations are undertaken with haste or without thought, watermelon becomes an OK food that is backwards and awkward.

Preparation: To start, watermelon has to be cold. Store the melon in the refrigerator for at least several hours before consuming. Next, the watermelon has to be sliced. There is no alternative. The slices should be anywhere from 1-5 inches thick, depending on how hungry you are. The ends of the watermelon should be discarded, only slices of watermelon with pink on the top and bottom and green all the way around the edges should ever be served. To further cut a watermelon into wedges is the destruction of a perfectly good food. It is the wedge shape that absolutely destroys a watermelon and the delectable goodness that it stands for.

Presentation: The watermelon should be served with the wider side up on a plate that is slightly larger in circumference than the melon slice. Watermelon should always be served with a spoon. A silver spoon is most appropriate, but any metal spoon will produce satisfactory results. A napkin is not required when serving watermelon. If you are really going to enjoy the watermelon, you have to be willing to put up with some spoon spray and mouth drippage.

Consumption: To eat a watermelon you press the spoon into the flesh, turn the spoon 360 degrees and form a perfect watermelonspoon shape. Watermelonspoon is the official name of the shape that is extracted from a slice of watermelon by inserting a spoon and turning it 360 degrees. It is not quite a sphere, but really there is no other name for the shape, therefore I named it myself. Watermelonspoon shapes of watermelon should be taken from the outer pink edges of the watermelon first. You should take the melon from as close to the rind as you can, so as not to waste any of the sweet goodness, but this is the least sweet part of the melon so consume it first before you move onto the center portions. The key to eating watermelon is to eat a ring of watermelon that is just inside the rind, leaving the center (the heart) for the last. If your outer ring is not wide enough, there will be some pink flesh left that either contains seeds, or contains the little pock marks where seeds should be. The seed area is the next area that needs to be eaten.

At this point your plate should be a ring of rind to be discarded and the very center, brightest pink area of the heart left. This is the best part of the watermelon. If you massacre a watermelon and serve it in wedges, the heart -- the very best part of the watermelon-- is the first bite and it just gets worse from there. If you eat a watermelon correctly, you save the heart for the last and you have the opportunity to enjoy the pinnacle of nature's sweetness and savor it in your mouth for the rest of the evening.

While it doesn't really matter how long you take to eat the outer portions of your watermelon, the heart is to be savored. Every bite should be extremely small and consumed slowly in order to maximize the enjoyment of the fruit. When you take that final bite, you are done and should discard the rind. You should NOT, however wipe your face. You should let the ultimate sweetness that dribbled down your chin remain on your face as a reminder of your recent consumption of perfection.

If you have any questions on how to eat a watermelon, please let me know. I am always at your service and would love to demonstrate the proper techniques.

Another garden parable

2010-06-05T07:30:00.002-06:00

Unlike my tomatoes, my strawberries had the right goal all along. They were thriving, pushing their greenness toward the sun and sending little balls of sweet red goodness off in every direction.

My strawberries had found their purpose in life. They were living large and accomplishing their dreams.

One morning I came out to find that much of my strawberry patch had been torn up and the strawberry plants were thrown all around and otherwise trampled. Before I blamed the kids, I observed for awhile and found that it wasn't the kids who had done this, it was the chickens.

Most of the dirt in my yard is covered in something that is growing or mulch. The strawberry patch is an exception. The birds found that the strawberry patch was the perfect place for a dirt bath, except the strawberries were in the way. The chickens didn't have anything against the strawberries, but they needed that dirt to bathe. The strawberries depended on the dirt to reach their goals, it was the foundation of everything strawberries were able to become.

The chicken went after the strawberries, not to destroy the strawberries, but to be able to use the dirt for a bath. The strawberries were scratched, pecked and otherwise trampled and pushed out of the way so that the chickens could use the dirt for another purpose.

My thoughts are done. I like the tomato story better. I need to find a conclusion to this one. The lesson could be that some will trample your goals and dreams just to get at something they want, but I don't like that. Surely there is a better lesson here.

Tomatoes

2010-05-29T05:00:00.002-06:00

Last year was the first year I tried growing heirloom tomatoes. I didn't choose the best spot in the yard for them, and I think the squirrels harvested more than we did, but other than that they turned out better than I could have hoped.

The beauty of heirloom varieties is that you can save the seeds and replant them. This goes right along with my beliefs and how I want to do things, so I saved seeds. It's not easy to save tomato seeds. The gelatinous stuff that the seeds are in are an anti-sprouting material. So you have to let the gelatinous stuff rot, but not the seeds and then you can save the seeds for the next year.

I had high aspirations. I saved the seeds and was eager to plant them this spring. Shooting for the stars, I got out my seeds, put them in some compost, watered them and put them under a light in the basement.

Despite my high aspirations, I didn't go about this project quite right. I think that I kept the light too far above the plants. As the tomatoes grew, they grew long and spindly, with little strength. The light was too far away and while the little plants reached for their goal, it was unattainable and unnatural. The plants still grew, and I had hope.

The tomatoes eventually had enough leaves to transplant outdoors. I put more than a dozen plants into the ground, with high hopes of my pathetic looking little plants overcoming their early life hardship and developing into high yield tomato plants.

Our first rainstorm after planting the tomatoes outside pummeled all but three of the little plants. Those three plants have continued to grow, but they are far from thriving. They are still spindly and pale.

While it was admirable that the tomatoes went with all of their might after the first goal that they were exposed to, it wasn't the right goal. The seeds spent all of their energy going after an unnatural and inappropriate goal. They didn't know it was the wrong goal, they only saw it as light and they sought after it like tomatoes are supposed to. After pouring all of their energy into pursuing a goal that did not provide them the sustenance that they needed, I moved them outside into a natural situation where they should be able to strive. They had already spent their energy. They were done. They may still be alive, but they will never be what they could have been. If they produce fruit, they will be small and few, but more likely they will never even produce a seed that I would be able to use to plant next year. All because they pursued the first goal that was placed before them... the wrong goal.

$40

2010-05-17T19:40:00.002-06:00

I worry a lot about money. When I consider buying something, cost is almost always a major factor. We 'rent' our movies from the library because it is free. I can't remember the last movie I paid to see in a theater. I rarely pay to eat out. Other than the one work related activity every month, I can count on one hand the number of times I have eaten out in the last year or two.

I'm cheap and I am very deliberate where my money goes. We make a conscious effort to spend less on gas and electricity and we conserve water the best we can. I am cheap and I have been called a raging tree hugger. I am OK with both descriptions. But when the gas gauge in the car approaches 'E', no matter what else is going on, I go drop $40 to fill it with unenvironmentalism. How is it that something that I am against in so many ways have such control over my life?

Distracted

2010-05-02T14:52:00.003-06:00

I've been distracted lately. Actually it has been for quite awhile. I'm not talking about a person walking by who attracts my attention or my mild ADD that just doesn't allow me to stay focused for extended periods of time. The main problem is that I don't know what the distraction is.

At work I am excited to be doing a lot of things. I've got projects that will get my work going in the direction that I want it to go, but it's not going. I'm not getting to the projects that I want to be doing.

At home I am excited to do a lot of things, but I'm not getting to them. Or at least I'm not getting to them with the energy that I want to pursue them. I am distract from what I really want to do and what I really want to be.

I've spent a lot of time in academia and have received many grades in my life. I've even given many grades in my life. If I were to grade my life at this point, I would give myself a D+ or C-. With grade inflation of today I would probably end up in the B range, but I've always considered C average and in line with expectations. I am performing below my expectations for myself and I need to step it up a notch if I'm going to judge my life on par with my expectations.

[What I have thus far written, was written yesterday before I ran out of time, and I am continuing now]

I've had some time to reflect on my distraction. In large part, I think I have figured out what it is distracting me and it is 'I'. My focus in life has been too much on me and what I want to do and not enough on others.

In my job I find that I have been thinking too much of what I want to do with my career and the things that I have already done. My thoughts have been about me and my aspirations. My personal aspirations have gotten in the way of the people I want to help and what I can do in the position that I currently hold to best provide for those I wish to serve.

At home I think of the things that I want to accomplish. I focus on my goals as they pertain to my desires. Sure, I spend time with my family and we have fun, but it is after I have finished the things that I need to get done. I focus on what I can do to get my family ahead and I often think too much of the financial concerns that we have and not enough on the time that I have to spend. I've long known that time is far more valuable than money, especially when it comes to dealing with people, but I often dedicate my time at home to accomplishing things (some of those things quite important) rather than time with people (which will always be more important).

If I am going to improve my grade, I need to change the way I study. I need to focus my efforts on others. I am going to go on a fast from 'I'. It has been done before and maybe even right here on this blog, but it needs to be done again. How long can you go without saying, "I"?

A Good Use of Money

2010-04-24T07:31:00.002-06:00

I just got back from a brief business trip. The trip was great, I am excited about what I learned at the conference and I'm excited to try and apply it, but now I want to write about the highlight of the trip, which didn't take place during the conference.

I was walking down Peachstreet in downtown Atlanta and Andre (he introduced himself) started walking with me and asked for a couple bucks. I said, "no" because I don't like giving money to people. I kept walking and Andre stopped to find someone else to make befriend. I thought about it as I walked away. I had six hours to get to the airport that was 20 minutes away. I decided that the next person who asked for money, I would take to lunch.

I kept walking and quickly realized that I was going to reach the subway before I found another panhandler. I wasn't particularly excited to be 6 hours early for a flight. I turned around to look for Andre. I couldn't find him. Disappointed that I wasn't able to follow through on my idea, but grateful that I wouldn't be spending the money, I turned back toward the subway.

Then our eyes met. It certainly wasn't romantic, but that brief eye contact opened the opportunity for her to ask. She wanted money. I don't like giving people money. I asked if she was hungry and she responded in the affirmative. I asked her if I could take her to lunch, and we took off across the street to what looked like a taco joint. It turned out to be more up-scale, but that was OK. We found a booth and the waitress brought us a menu. She had a Dr. Pepper and a Steak Torta (I don't really know what that is, but that is what it says on my receipt). Including a tip, it came to $15.

The best part, and the reason for the 'date', was the conversation. Her name is Rachael. She was originally from Louisiana, but came to Atlanta with her daughter. Her daughter left 2.5 years ago, taking Rachael's ID and leaving her homeless and without her ID she couldn't get a job. She has gone through some helpful agencies and acquired what she needed to get an ID, but both times it rained and ruined her paperwork. In the past she has been a mechanic and truck driver, but at one point she mentioned that panhandling really paid fairly well. The first time I asked, she said that when she returns to work, she would like to be a mechanic. The second time it came up in the conversation, she said she wanted to be an astronaut.

At one point I asked Rachael if she was happy. While she didn't always seem truthful in her responses (I found a lot of inconsistencies that I questioned), the toothless smile on her face and her excited body language confirmed to me that she was genuinely happy. I asked her why.... What makes her happy? Her response was powerful: Peace. Growing up she was sexually molested by her father, although none of her family believed that he would do that. She was married three times and each of those marriages was at least verbally abusive and it sounded like there were at times physically abusive as well. All of her marriages kept her suppressed. Her family was fairly wealthy and she even tracked some distant relatives to the Governor's office in Louisiana. She valued peace more than she valued wealth - maybe I should call it financial stability. I questioned her authenticity when she said this, but she lived what she said. Was I questioning her really thinking that peace was better than wealth? Or was I questioning abuse? Or was I questioning whether her other options were really options or merely her imagination? I don't like that I questioned her.

I asked her what the most important thing she had learned from being homeless was. Her response was respect. She talked about how she learned that it was inappropriate to interrupt and the importance of listening. I was unable to connect the dots and really understand why this was the most significant thing that she had learned, but I thought it was an interesting comment.

She also asked about my family and situation. I told her about leaving college to take a lower paying job that would better align with what I really wanted from life and would ultimately make me happier. She approved. I told her about my four young boys and she told me that I should take them fishing; it would teach them patience.

She ate half her meal and put the rest in a to-go box. I was grateful that she would also have dinner that night. I paid for the meal (I enjoyed a water while we talked and she ate) and we left. She offered to walk me to the subway, but I declined. She thanked me numerous times and gave me a big hug as we parted ways. I checked to make sure my wallet was still in my pocket and I still feel ashamed that I'm that distrustful.

I made it to the airport with five hours to spare. I got to sit and watch people, thousands of people, with enough money to fly where they wanted to, eat what they wanted to and communicate freely with those close to them. With the abundant wealth in the world, why will the highlight of Rachael's day be going to sleep in the park with a full stomach?

Squirrels

2010-04-17T20:42:00.002-06:00

I enjoy watching the squirrels in the back yard chasing each other around, jumping from branch to branch and seeming so comfortable in the trees. It amazes me that they can jump from the outer most branches of one tree to the outer most branches of another tree. It is as if they were designed specifically for playing in trees. They have all the confidence in the world, and I've never seen one fall, although I've often thought they should.

What is my squirrel activity? What do I do so naturally that it comes easy and is almost like play while I'm doing it? What is that activity where I would have no perceivable fear of falling? What challenge can I make look easy while bystanders wonder why I haven't fallen on my face?

Someday I hope to grow up and be a squirrel.

Why I hate recycling

2010-04-07T18:28:00.002-06:00

I've been called a "raging tree hugger" and I took it as a compliment. I would certainly consider myself an environmentalist and I feel that recycling is one of the greatest disservices to the environmental movement.

I don't want to be misunderstood. I recycle and I think that recycling is important. I also think that recycling is an easy cop-out for over consumption. I hear it all the time, "Print as many copies of that as you want, you can always recycle it", or "I go through 3 or 4 plastic bottles a day, but I make sure to recycle all of them".

People don't seem to understand that the paper or bottles that they use were produced at least hundreds, if not thousands of miles away. It pumps exhaust into the air to get them to the consumer. When you use more of the stuff, even if you recycle it, that means more exhaust being pumped into the atmosphere to transport stuff.

We also don't seem to realize that plastic and paper don't exactly grow on trees. Well, the paper sort of does grow on trees, but that is beside the point. The processing to produce paper and plastic produces a lot of pollution. When we recycle the paper or plastic it may save us from having to produce more from scratch, but it still requires polluting remanufacturing and processing. It's not like they rinse out the old water bottles and refill them. They melt the plastic (burn lots of fuel and pump lots of exhaust into the atmosphere) and reform the bottles.

Of course I recognize that recycling is better than contributing to landfills. The problem that I have is that recycling makes people feel like they are environmental. It makes people feel like they are doing the right thing, when in reality they are hardly going through the movements.

Do you know the little triangle recycling symbol? Did you know that each arrow that is a corner of the triangle represents something? Did you know that the meaning comes in order of importance? So here it is: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle. Unfortunately we seem to follow the environmental slogan of "massively over consume and then recycle to help yourself feel better about yourself."

It makes me wonder what it will take to wean people from the disposable water bottle. What if someone were to create a device where water would be delivered to your lips, free of charge at the touch of a button? I would guess that people would use them to spit in.

Sorry about my rant. I seem to have some pent up opinion that needed to be shared. I'm going to go watch "Food, Inc." now. You'll never be able to guess what my next rant will be about.

regurgitated thoughts

2010-03-29T18:42:00.002-06:00

I don't seem to have any thoughts of my own today, so I'm going to share some interesting things I've read recently.

I'm currently reading an older book by Micheal Pollan. Right now I'm reading about weeds. Did you know that most of the weeds that we battle with in our gardens were actually imported with early settlers from Europe? That is right, everything from the dandelion to the tumbleweed has European roots and would not be here had we not brought it with us.

Another interesting note that Pollan made was that weeds don't grow unless we mess with the soil and try to grow something besides what is already there. Forest is forest and never seems to be in danger of being over taken by any once species. But take out the forest and plant a lawn and you will spend the rest of your life battling to keep dandelions and winter creeper from taking over every inch of land that you own.

Another story... this one I found a lot of humor in, and it's a story we all know. It's the story of Johnny apple-seed. As the story goes, Johnny Apple-seed traveled around the US, planting seeds to grow apple trees and every time you find a random apple tree you can thank Johnny for planting it a long time ago so that you can enjoy that apple.

Here's the problem: Apple trees grown from seeds don't produce good apples. If you have an apple tree that produces apples that you like and you want another tree, you have to graft the branches and 'make' another tree. If you take the seeds from the good apple and plant it, the chromosomes have mixed and the fruit from that seed will almost always be bad tasting and drastically inferior to the previous apple.

So our hero, Johnny, moved around the country planting apple seeds that would produce bad tasting apples. A bad tasting apple isn't as bad as no apple at all, so I suppose Johnny was doing good by planting the seeds. Actually, many people took good advantage of those apples. While the apples weren't especially good for eating, you can use the apples to make into alcoholic beverages. So Johnny's apples were put to especially good use during times of prohibition. I recently heard that story and it completely changed the way I looked at Johnny Apple-seed.

swimming lessons

2010-03-23T19:32:00.002-06:00

After my kids' swimming lessons today I got to go swimming with my boys. The four year old liked throwing a little floating toy into the pool and then chasing it (he's getting better at swimming, but he was still supported by a noodle). I learned a lot watching him chase the floating toy.

So my son would stand on the edge of the pool with his noodle. He would throw the floating toy into the pool and jump in after it. He would then swim toward the floating toy with his flailing sort of stroke. He never actually caught the floating toy without my help.

He would be leaning on the noodle, paddling as hard as he could with his arms and kicking as hard as he could with his legs (neither of which have become the most efficient stroke yet) and he was able to move very slowly around the pool while expending tons of calories.

The reason he never caught the floating toy was not because he was unable to move in the water, but because every stroke he made with his arms made a wave that pushed the toy away from him. He would get very close, but the paddling that he was using to propel himself made the toy float away from him. The faster he paddled and the harder he tried, the faster the toy would float away.

I sometimes feel the same way in my pursuit of goals. I'm trying hard, I'm doing what I know how to do, but somehow in my technique of doing things I'm continually pushing my goals out of reach. I need to learn efficiency. I need a new technique. Try as I will, I will never reach my goals if my approach and effort push my goals away from me.

Don't sacrifice what you want most for what you want at the moment

2010-03-21T14:59:00.003-06:00

That was the main topic at church today. I enjoyed it. I know the 'right' answer. I want eternal life 'most' and I need to follow the commandments and believe now in order to be able to get what I really want. I'm fine with what they wanted me to learn.

I learned a lot more. I applied this more to my secular life. What am I doing with my life now? That question is easy to answer, I do that every day... What do I want most? What is it that I am working toward? What are my ultimate goals in life? Where do I want to be in 20 years?

I have some vague ideas of what I want most. Family comes to mind first. I envision a time where I can spend a lot of time with my boys working along side them, helping them learn and grow. -That won't pay the bills. I think of helping people be healthy. -I'm glad that comes to mind since I spent a lot of time in college studying that. I think of working outside and coming home sore every night. -I like that. I think of sustainable living and living off the land and within the means that the land can provide. -I love nature and how it all works together, I want to be able to better understand, apply and teach the connections of life.

Sometimes I joke that I want to be an organic farmer. While there is some truth in that desire, I don't know nearly enough about farming to make a living of it. I also don't especially like the prospect of having to find a market for my goods to sell them. I just like playing in the dirt.

I think the place that I would most like to be is on an organic farm, but not for food production. I would want a farm for people to visit. I would like to make money showing people and families how to live off the land. I'm not thinking of trying to convert people to Mennonite type society, but I'm thinking of demonstrating to people that the land offers health. Working in the yard can provide exercise, eating what your land produces can provide health and there is an intellectual, and almost meditative aspect to working and understanding the land that is an important part of health. My farm could be a weight loss clinic, a summer camp and a roadside stand. I want to model and teach a lifestyle that is sustainable and health promoting, and that offers pieces that anyone could apply.

So those are my dreams, the real question that I took from the Sunday School lesson was "is what you are doing now preventing you from getting to where you want to go?" I'm blessed to work for an organization that is focused on making holistic health accessible to all. In part my current situation is a great preparation for where I want to be. I'm learning about people and helping them. I'm gaining skills that I need to develop. On the other hand, I spend most of my time in a weight room. I'm helping people, but I fear that the vast minority of people truly enjoy going to the gym to exercise and will therefore be unable to stick with a workout routine. I think people need to be accomplishing something as they 'work-out'. People need to find hobbies that make them work (and I'm referring to physically challenging work here) to achieve a goal that they are excited to reach.

I'm in a position where I certainly haven't sacrificed what what I want most, but at a certain point in time I may miss the opportunity to pursue what I want most and I will end up settling for less than my dreams. On the other hand, if I leave my current situation before I have enough experience, I will again miss my dreams being unprepared to get where I want to.

The garden

2010-03-20T20:44:00.002-06:00

Today I made the major preparations for my garden. I spent the week building raised beds. Today I put covered the bottom of the raised beds with newspapers and then leaves that I've been saving since last fall. Then I filled the boxes with topsoil so that we can plant something soon.

While we have a fenced yard that keeps the chickens in, I had to put up an additional fence within the yard to keep the chickens out of the garden. While putting the fence up, I watched one of the chickens fly over the fence, into the garden to be with the other chickens. I am hoping that now that I have them all outside of the fence, they will be content there and not fly over into the garden. Seriously, that was the highest and farthest I've seen my chickens fly (4 feet high for about 10 feet).

We planted bulbs and some flower seeds in the front and have big plans for our giant garden area.

This is the first time I have purchased topsoil for a garden. I am having good feelings about that. I think it will help me prevent weeds and I know there are not nearly as many rocks in the soils as normal. I am, however, concerned that the soil didn't seem alive. I have noticed that good soil as little critters in it and I think that is a good thing. The soil that I bought is dead. I hope to reincarnate it, but we'll see.

Where are we going?

2010-03-09T18:09:00.002-07:00

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” –Confucius

I only wonder if Confucius knew where we were going. I've been thinking a lot about distance. Not necessarily a distance measured in kilometers (or miles for the less smug among us), but rather distance in a generic form. While I have dozens of examples of this and really wish I could start writing more about them, I am going to talk about trees.

I think that electronics, especially video games, have distanced us from reality. Children don't understand what death is. Granted, it's a complex thought that takes time to really understand, but I don't think that our media intake is helping anything. The last time I played video games I was playing Super Mario Brothers. While I was never good at the game and I knew very little about it. This much I did know, I had three chances to get past world 1-1 or my game would be over. So I had the opportunity to die three times before my humiliating destruction was complete. While I assume that video games have changed since I played, I still think that you get more than one life.

If you watch the news in the evenings there is a lot of information on violence and war. While we hear the term 'death' frequently in the news, we never really see the consequences of it. The general public doesn't get that pain associated with losing a loved one or the pain associated with death. We only get statistics and if we watch again tomorrow we'll get more statistics.

The media we expose our children to is distancing them from reality. They are consuming more and more of non-reality and it is replacing reality in their lives. They are becoming distanced from consequences.

Don't worry, I have the solution. I think that kids should be allowed to play in trees. Kids need to fall out of trees to know about real consequences. Can kids get hurt, yes. Could it even kill them, yes. I don't take that lightly, but is a life without climbing trees a life worth living? We want to protect our children, but our we protecting them to the point where they don't really get to experience childhood or life?

Real life experiences and experiencing real pain is going to lessen our distance from reality. Each step that we take in life is leading us toward a destination. Do we want that destination to be reality or a place that media wants us to think of as reality? Not only do you need to take steps in life, but they have to lead where you want to go.

Chess

2010-03-07T16:30:00.002-07:00

I need to preface this by saying that I am terrible at chess. I know the basic rules, but I have very little strategy. My boys have started playing chess (and therefore so have I), so I have had the opportunity recently to test some different strategies.

Had you challenged me to a game of chess a couple of weeks ago, after trying to get out of the game, I would have reverted to my only strategy. I would have moved the pieces around my king as little as possible in hopes of protecting him. In reality my only real goal with that strategy is to postpone my defeat (humiliation) as long as possible.

In playing more frequently in the past couple of weeks, I have noticed that it can be helpful to get your pieces spread out so they have the chance to move the ways they were designed to move. Playing defensively and simply trying to protect your king is a weak strategy compared to an aggressive strategy where you get the pieces in positions where you can use their mobility as an advantage.

Thus it is with life. If you spend all of your time and energy protecting what you have, all you are doing is postponing the time when you will recognize that you never gave yourself a chance to truly succeed. Situating yourself where you can use your skills, on the other hand, will allow you to take advantage of opportunities when they arise. Whether you find yourself successful or not in the end, you can know that you situated yourself to use your skills and took advantage of opportunities life dealt you. In the end, that may be the definition of a 'successful life'.

The game of chess is growing on me. I'm not especially good at it, but I am learning to play to win rather than trying to postpone humiliation. It turns out that losing isn't the worst thing that could happen. It's a fun game. And at this point I win fairly regularly since I only ever play a 4 and 6 year old.

Two income economy

2010-03-06T21:56:00.002-07:00

I went for a bike ride with a friend today and in the course of conversation, he mentioned that it was getting harder to support a family on a single income. More and more the economy is becoming a two income economy.

I don't know for sure what that means. I suppose it means that it takes two incomes to support a family these days. But does it? Is the economy so tight that it requires two jobs to survive or is it that our culture entices us to buy so much stuff that we need two incomes to afford it?

On a certain level I find it hard to believe that we need to have two incomes so survive. What do people do that requires that much money? I make ~$30,000/year and my wife doesn't work outside of the home. While we aren't putting as much in savings as I would like, we have enough to support our family of 6.

On a similar note, we have someone at work who is coming in to do financial management seminars for interested individuals. I find it interesting that we find people who make tons of money (I'm talking about you Suze) to tell us how to set a budget. People who make six figure incomes generally have a different understanding of budgeting than those who have to decide between fresh vegetables and putting gas in the car.

While there is certainly nothing wrong with making money or even making a lot of money, I think that we can all work to better understand the true needs in life versus the wants.

TV

2010-03-05T05:27:00.002-07:00

I'm coming out of the closet, I'm a hypocrite and it needs to change.

We sold our TV about 7 years ago, not long after my oldest son was born. It was an easy decision as I noticed that my time with my son was being pulled toward the TV. It was an easy choice, so the TV went. We haven't had one since.

In the last couple of years I have started watching occasional shows on Hulu or other such websites. An occasional show isn't the end of the world and I sometimes enjoy watching a movie there with my wife. Recently, I have been watching too much and it has to stop. I love the idea of being a person without a TV, but at this point I'm an impostor and a hypocrite. So the shows have to go. Frankly, there are times when I wish the computer would go all together, but there are a lot of good things that I do on my home computer. Blogging, for example I consider a valuable use of my time because it gives me the opportunity to express my ideas and write.

My problem is that when I'm at the computer working on something of value, I often like to try and 'multi-task'. What that really means is that I pull something worthwhile up on the screen along side a video or show and make it look like I'm doing two things at the same time, but in reality only one thing is ever accomplished.

There, I've announced it to the world (or the 2 people who know that I've started blogging again). The video websites are out, I'm not watching them anymore.

Soap

2010-02-27T16:38:00.003-07:00

One of my new hobbies is making soap. I like the mad scientist feel of stirring my boiling cauldron and then having to let it sit for a long time before I can test it. Some day I will have enough confidence in my soap to let people try it or maybe even sell it to unsuspecting victims. For now I will just mass product soap and store it until we use it all.

I've made a variety of soaps. The first was a basic lard and lye soap which was OK. Then I made a mint soap that was a little better, but still didn't turn out exactly how it was supposed to. The third soap I made was green apple scented. I liked that one, it works great on my hair, but I really liked the idea of not using scents.

The last soap I made was my first vegetarian soap and I made it with oatmeal and honey. I really liked the way it turned out. I made it with oils that would make it good on the hair, but the little chunks of oatmeal stick in your hair which is less than desirable. The honey makes it rough so it's a good exfoliate. This was a pretty good soap, but while it keeps my hands moist, it makes my face all oily and I don't like that. I do like using the oatmeal and honey soap on my hands and the green apple soap for my body, face and hair.

OK, I really like making the soap, but I'm really bad at judging them.

My ultimate success in soap making is with the shape. In my 32 years of life, I have noticed that bar soap is the wrong shape. It fits nicely into your hand when you first open the package, but then within a short time it's long and thin so that it breaks and just doesn't work out right. When I made the oatmeal honey soap, I cut it into almost a cube shape. When you first start using the soap, it's a little awkward, but it fits nicely in the hand in no time at all. And it keeps a nice shape until it is almost gone. Right now a normal bar of soap would be so thin that it would break, but with my not-yet-patented soap shape, it is still usable and convenient.

Tonight I'm going to try and make a citrus soap.

Wrestle time

2010-02-26T19:28:00.002-07:00

One of my favorite things to do with the boys is to wrestle. Sometimes I will let them pin me down and tell them to keep me pinned down and then I will try to get all of them pinned at the same time (which takes a little doing since there are three of them and they are all quite squirmy. Other times I will throw them around one at a time and let them enjoy the ride.

I really enjoy wrestle time and the Mugwump has expressed on numerous occasions that is one of his favorite things. The problem is that when my back is a little sore or I'm tired, it's hard to muster the motivation to roll around and wrestle with kids who have no respect for a sore back.

The other day I was flinging Jaguar (two year old) around and then the Mugwump (6 year old) wanted me to do the same thing to him. I realized that he was too big. When did he get too big for me to fling him around? I noticed missed opportunities in the past. Today the Mugwump set a 'family goal' to have wrestle time every night. I'm not sure that my back will handle that, but we'll try. And who let's the kids decide the family goals?

Chickens

2010-02-25T15:14:00.002-07:00

I found a new use for my chickens today. I got some big translucent plastic barrels from work that I'm going to use to plant things earlier in the season. Since we have new garden ideas for this year (under the oak tree didn't work well for us last year), we need to clear some grass away.

I hate clearing grass away. That means that I have to spend time with my pick-ax tearing up the lawn. It's good exercise and all, but it never works out right. The soil is always clumpy and the grass generally grows back in my garden which I then have to weed out grass that I put there myself. It never works out how I want it to.

Today I found the spot where I wanted to start the first little piece of my garden, so I sprinkled some chicken feed in that area. The chickens have been eating and scratching at that spot for the last 20 minutes. The grass isn't gone yet, but I have high hopes. Who needs oxen or a tractor to pull big devices through the soil. I'm going to use my chickens. ... I have yet to see if it actually works.

The living of dreams

2010-02-21T12:51:00.002-07:00

I am a big proponent of living your dreams. I think that pursuing dreams should be more important than making money... although not having enough money to feed your family certainly wouldn't be considered a dream. Drifting aimlessly at pursuits that at one point seem like a dream is also not what I have in mind when I think of living my dreams.

My dreams seem to involve an organic farm and sustainable living. There are a lot of smaller components that are involved in my dream, but being able to work alongside my family and make a living while sustaining and helping better the land is my dream.

Just one problem. I don't know how to farm. I've had some mediocre gardens and I've raised almost enough eggs to support my family's egg habit, but really I don't have the knowledge that I need to pursue my dreams. That's OK, I can learn.

Here is the thing that really annoys me. When I look at people who say they are living their dreams it always seems to be prefaced with quitting a high paying job, or finally coming upon the money to get things started. There are seldom stories of the guy making $30k a year who is suddenly able to pursue his dreams.

What if part of my dream is to show that it doesn't take lots of money to pursue dreams? What if I want to do this without making lots of money? What if it's more about the path than the outcome?

"Don't ask what the world needs, ask what makes you come alive. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." (someone said it and I don't know who.)

Maiden voyage

2010-02-20T11:25:00.002-07:00

When I was 13 I saved up my money and I bought my first real bike. Maybe I should rewind a little. The day before and the day of my 13th birthday I road my first Seattle to Portland bike ride. it was 200 miles and it took 2 LONG days. My first year I rode a Huffy 10-speed. We called it the 'pipe bike' because it weighed in at no less than 50 pounds (that may be an exaggeration, but it weighed ALOT).

With that first big bike ride I proved to my parents that maybe I would stick with cycling. I dreamed of saving up for a Trek 1420. A top notch road bike with a triple chainring on the front. As a 14 year old, more gears was better. I eventually settled for a Trek 1100 which wasn't quite as nice as the 1420, but it still had way more gears than I would ever need. I rode that bike for years.

Last week I bought a 1992 Trek 1400 on Ebay. It is essentially the same as a 1420, except with 14 gears instead of 21. Today I took my dream bike on it's first ride. Actually, it has probably been on lots of rides, but it was the first that she did with me.

I have named the bike 'my therapist' because that is what it is.

The plan for the day was to carry enough food and water to spend about 2 hours lost. I succeeded. I headed for horse country and started my morning watching a horse rolling around in the snow. I wished I had a camera; I would have called the picture, "snow angels".

I went over Zion's Hill which, from my understanding, was one of the first settlements of free blacks in the area.

I found a mill next to a river. It appeared to me as if the river was the original source of power for the mill and I wonder if it still is (I doubt it, but how cool would that be?). By the mill was a stone fence built with old mill stones. It was a beautiful place.

There was a place where I briefly found a busy road that I didn't want to spend a lot of time on. That was the only part of the ride that was even remotely bad.

As I returned toward the city I saw a woodpecker with a bright red head and thought of the old "Woody-Woodpecker" cartoons. I'm sure that Woody was taken from this type of woodpecker. I also saw a small group of cardinals, all bright red against the snow covered backdrop.

The thing I liked the most about my ride was the opportunity to dream. I thought of a short film I watched last night about a couple ladies in Portland that became 'backyard farmers'. instead of starting a CSA, which requires a bunch of land and water rights, etc. They started a business farming in other peoples' yards. So if you want fresh produce, you call these ladies to make your backyard produce food. They come weekly and weed and leave anything they picked next to your door. I think it's a great idea. I dream of doing something like that.

I got home, changed clothes and was instantly slapped with reality. My taxes are almost finished and I should be able to file them next week.

What's new

2010-02-19T16:04:00.002-07:00

I haven't posted in a long time. Every time I think of posting, I feel that I don't have anything to say. I would really like to post more and i would really like to keep up on my writing because I have some ideas for things I would like to publish.

So here is what is new at the Sans House. Actually, I am sans auto; I do have a house. Actually, I drove my wife's car to work three times this week due to needing to be places across town in time frames that made the bicycle unreasonable.

First an update on the chickens. After the problems with wildlife, we have 7 chickens left and they have started laying. Tuesday we got 8 eggs (I think that was from a couple of days). Wednesday we got 2. Thursday 6, and today we got 5. I couldn't be more pleased with the amount of eggs we are getting from the chickens. The chickens range most of the day and they have actually turned out to be a little smarter than I initially anticipated. On cold, snowy days with high winds I will open the door to their henhouse and they will stick their heads out, but then turn right around and stay warm. Not as dumb as they initially seem.

My compost pile is coming right along and feel really good about the progress of the garden... at least in thought. We have big plans for the garden, but with several inches of snow still on the ground, we haven't progressed much.

The next step is bees. I have recently found that I enjoy making soap. I also like eating sweet things. It seems logical then, that I should start a bee hive in my back yard. I will have fresh honey and bees wax for making soap and like products.

When I started looking into building a beehive, they said that it would cost at least $300 to get started, and really it would take more than that. I almost gave up there, but I figured I could save a bunch of money by making my own hive container. I then found that you can capture a swarm rather than buying the bees. I also discovered that I really had no desire to 'capture' a swarm, but have found some information on attracting a swarm. So I'm going to give it a shot. I will be building a hive in the next few weeks that I estimate will cost about $5 in supplies and a bunch of scraps that I have collected from various sources. I'll post pictures and stuff once I make more progress. I'm really excited to have bees.

I have things to post about, but it seems that I never do. I will change that and soon I will be posting several times a week.

Leaves

2009-11-25T20:03:00.002-07:00

I raked up my leaves weeks ago. I made one big pile, let the boys jump in it for a bit and then I distributed the pile under the new fruit trees in my yard. I guess the way I look at things is that trees drop leaves for a reason. The leaves compost and make good soil, so why don't I make piles under my trees to improve the soil. It seems a lot like how mother nature would do it.

So I haven't put any leaves in bags or anything. It is now the time when neighbors are putting their leaves at the street to get picked up. So I asked my neighbor if I could have his leaves. He thought it was a little weird, but we've got chickens in the backyard and giant rain barrels collecting rain on the sides of our house. He's used to weird.

The neighbor even loaned me a giant drop-cloth to pile the leaves on and drag them to my house. It worked great. I had a huge pile of leaves over to my back yard in 4 trips. As I was dragging piles of leaves across the street, I got two comments. One was from a lady that asked, "What are you doing with the leaves?" I responded that I would use them as compost. She was OK with that and said that if I wanted to clean up any more leaves and haul them away she had some in her yard that I could have. As much as I like the idea of using the leaves, I declined her offer.

The second comment that I got was from a teenaged kid. He asked, "Are you keepin' them?" I answered, "yes". He continued, "For what?" I said that I would let them rot into dirt and plant a vegetable garden in my yard. His final response, I think meant that he was OK with the idea, but the nouveau slang was beyond my understanding.

It strikes me as peculiar that people don't understand that we would keep the leaves that fall from the trees. It's like the leaves are nothing but a burden. As if the tree spends lots of energy through the spring and summer just to produce leaves to drop and annoy the person who has to clean them. How do people not think of why the leaves would be dropped. How do we not think of an alternative short of cramming them into plastic bags and sending them to the dump?

I'm excited to be using mother nature to prepare my garden for next year. I have a long ways to go and will need all the help I can get. I might as well find help with lots of experience and inexpensive materials.

Losing Nature

2009-11-01T18:46:00.002-07:00

While I have been pleased with our move to Kentucky, there is one thing that I've recently noticed that I miss. I have lost a feel for nature in my life. When I was in Spanish Fork commuting to Provo daily I was on my bike outdoors at least 2 hours every day. I was acquainted with nature. I knew the phase the moon was in. I knew the direction the wind was coming from. I was getting a feel for the weather brought by different winds. I felt at one with nature. I felt like I was part of nature.

Here in Kentucky we've been blessed with a home close to my work. I only commute for about 15 minutes each way, and most of my commute is through the city. I don't have time to see the moon. I'm in well lit areas so I don't see the stars well and there is virtually no wildlife between home and work.

It may sound like I'm complaining that my commute is too short, but that isn't entirely true. Sure, I wish I was riding my bike more, but it's not like there is a shortage of roads here. It wouldn't take too much effort to add some distance to my morning and/or afternoon commutes. It wouldn't take much to get out into the countryside and see some beautiful stuff, but I don't because I don't have to.

This turns more into a frustration with myself. My job is to encourage and help people to make changes to improve their health. In most cases that means weight loss, but not always. Here I am struggling to make a change that I feel is important to be made. Sure I would rather be home with my family and when I get up early I don't like being dead tired when I get home. ... And I'm supposed to be helping people make changes in their lives.

Whenever I think about riding in early it comes down to the fact that I don't have a locker at work. Showers and lockers are available, but only for day use. I wouldn't be able to keep anything overnight. So I would have to keep stuff in my bag which makes the bike ride less attractive. Then I would have the fear of having super-wrinkled clothes all day. And when you get to work all decked out in spandex and shoes that you can hardly walk in, how do you look professional as you enter the building? There is the list of excuses that I have. None of them are that great of excuse.

It would seem that I would need to exercise to help with my personal weight maintenance, but that doesn't seem to be an issue. Last week I dropped below 140 pounds without any effort. In fact, I am now making an effort to eat more so that I can stay away from the emaciated look that accompanies my weight loss.

This week I'm going to work on refinding nature. I want to experience the moon and stars again. I want to feel the different winds and be able to tell what that says about the weather. I want to know about local wildlife. I don't care what I can learn on a nature walk, I want to know the places on the road to expect to be buzzed by an owl or come toe to toe with a skunk. I want to know the animals that are out and about in this area. I'm on a search for nature.

No, my kids don't want it!

2009-10-18T16:43:00.004-06:00

Please leave me alone. Let me change that, I want this to be more direct and sound less like a request and more like a command... LEAVE ME ALONE!

To the bank teller: No, we don't want the suckers and really it would have been better had you not offered us the suckers because now my kids are going to be whining about not getting suckers for the next 10 minutes. Maybe you want to have them for those 10 minutes, but whatever you do don't give them the sucker because it is bad for them and we don't live like that.

To the Sunday School teacher: While it is great that my kids are memorizing scriptures, can we encourage them to do that with out bribing them with junk that makes them wild and unruly, contributes to obesity and makes them think that food is a reward for good behavior. Let's find a way to encourage our kids to be good because it's the right thing to do, not for sweets. We can even call it 'being Christ-like' because I don't think Christ was bribed for his behavior.

To The Home Depot: OK, popcorn is better than the pure junk they get elsewhere, but really I would like to choose what to feed my children. I would choose a low fat, low salt diet and your popcorn was none of the above. When I need your help making my kids sick, I'll ask.

To the random lady who gave my kid a piece of candy to calm him down: Thanks...I think. He cried even harder when I took the candy away from him. I would far prefer he cry than deal with the consequences of him eating the candy. You see his crying was short lived, but after the sugar and artificial junk in the candy he will be unruly for quite some time and it contributes to poor health for the rest of his life.

Unlike most people, I'm trying to raise healthy children. I want them to eat right and not be loaded up on junk food. I believe in moderation with junk food and in my opinion a moderate amount is only slightly different than NEVER. I want them to have a good relationship with food. That means that I don't want them to think of food as a reward or something they use to comfort themselves. Food is something that you eat in order to give you health. How about if you be the parents to your children and I'll be the parents to mine.

Thank you

(FYI, this stemmed from nothing anyone who reads this blog does, this was just a thought that seems to drift in sometimes.)

Food storage

2009-09-26T20:01:00.002-06:00

One of my goals would be to grow most of our food so that we could store it and eat it through the year. We have a LONG way to go.

Last weekend we bought 2 bushels of #2 apples and made apple sauce, dried apples and apple pie filling. We'll spend ~$100 on fresh fruit now so that we can have it for the rest of the year. Frankly, I'm not really a fan of canned things from the store, but things that I can myself are pretty good, although I don't think it's possible to can green beans or peas and ever have it taste right.

People question the nutritional value of canned or frozen produce. Actually, it's not bad. Put it this way, fresh produce that is in season is the best. But what about in the winter? Is it better to get produce from half way across the country or even the world that was picked well before it was ripe and shipped for several days, or produce that was picked fresh and canned or frozen? I would argue that there could be more nutrition in the canned or frozen variety... well there could be, but not necessarily true. That is why I can my own fruit so that I know what is in the can (or jar, as the case may be).

Chickens

2009-08-09T19:39:00.001-06:00

A couple of weeks ago weird things started happening in the chicken coop. First I noticed some very large poop on the roof of the hen-house. I explained to myself that an interested animal could be watching from the chicken wire top on the coop and the poop just falls on through.

Then I noticed that the stick that I use to prop open the hen-house had fallen to the ground. The stick isn't huge, a chicken could surely bump it off a ledge, but it's kept in a spot that I don't think the chickens can get to. Maybe they could. So I was able to explain away that curious happening as well.

One day I found big animal poop inside the hen-house. I had to face the facts, something big was getting into the hen-house. I needed to first figure out what it was and second take care of it if it was something that shouldn't be in there. At first I figured it was Oreo, the neighborhood cat that doesn't actually belong to anyone, but everyone seems to feed. The poop was rather catesque, but seemed a bit big to be cat poop. It was also curious that none of the chickens had been killed. Well, we lost one quite some time ago to what I figure was a raccoon that stuck it's arm through the fence because I found the dead bird in the fence in bad shape, as if attacked by a cat or raccoon (I hadn't assumed Oreo's innocence in this matter either).

The next morning I went out there early and when I opened up the coop I found two baby raccoons camped up on a ledge inside the chicken coop. That was bad, but I needed to get to work. So I left. Besides, I didn't know how they got in there.

The next morning I woke up early and took a broom out there. The raccoons were there and there were actually three of them. I jabbed at them a bit with the broom until I got them to leave in an attempt to figure out how they got in there. The first one slid out before I could see how. The second one went right through the links of a chain link fence. I thought from the looks of it that there was no way it would fit, but it slid right through. The third one tried to slide right through, but seems to have gained a bit of weight since getting in and didn't make it. I opened the door for him and let him out. Here's a picture of the size of the raccoons and the size of their poop.
That afternoon I bought some chicken wire and wrapped the bottom of the fence in it so the raccoons couldn't just slide right through.

The next morning I went out and while they had already left, they had dug a hole under the fence and spend the night with the chickens. I put some wood and bricks down to stop them from getting in. I don't remember which morning it was, but one day I got a couple of good pictures of the raccoons in the hen house.

The next morning I found that the raccoons had been there again. I had done a poor job of blocking their passage way. I blocked the passage better and hoped for the best.

The next morning I went out and they had not gone under the fence, but they had still gotten in. I did a little looking and figured that hey must have climbed through the fence onto the roof, so I put some chicken wire up behind the hen-house thinking that if they were unable to step through onto something, they wouldn't be able to get through. I was wrong.
The next morning I went out there the raccoons were in there again (actually there were only two this time, I don't know what happened to the fat one that didn't fit through the links). I thought for a moment. Eventually these things would get big enough that they couldn't get through the links, but by that time I would guess they would realize that they had it pretty good with food, water and shelter at their fingertips. I was afraid that they would do anything to get in there, even if I wrapped the entire coop in chicken wire. The other option was to really get rid of them. So I went and got the only weapon that I had, a pitch fork, and I fatally wounded the two raccoons.

I say that so simply, but it really bothers me that I would do something like that. Sure, I took on the responsibility of protecting chickens, and that may have been the only way to protect the chickens (really I have no idea why I still have 9 chickens). I'm not the violent type that can kill an animal with a garden utensil... Yet I did. Now I find myself thinking about it a lot and feeling really bad. Additionally I will find myself tempted to tell the boys to stop playing violently, but I can't say it, not after brutally murdering animals in my back yard.

So the raccoons have been taken care of and nothing has been in the coop for the last two days (except the chickens). On to brighter subjects, I have a fun photo of Shack mowing the lawn.

I find it interesting that people will tell me that I need to be careful with the real mower because kids could get hurt... THis from people who use a gas mower because it's safer? Anyway, my oldest is the only one who is strong enough to make the blades move and he knows better. There seems to be a perseption that old technology is worse and more dangerous when in fact that isn't always the case. My mower cuts grass better than a gas mower and I have no reason to believe that it's any more dangerous.

The last video is one taken this evening of the Oldest child chasing the chickens trying to get them back into the coup. I let them out for a little foraging in the yard and they loved it.

Reverend Billy

2009-08-05T20:10:00.002-06:00

I posted a bit ago about my desire to be a pastor of my own little non-denominational cult. While there is some truths that provide the foundation for that post, I recognize that I will likely never be a pastor because it just wouldn't work for me. I'm OK with that.

I have, however found the church (cult?) that I want to follow when I grow up. This guy has some really disturbing things. I use that word 'disturbing' quite literally. I don't think he's a psycho or anything, but what he does disturbs me.

It disturbs me because I don't think he's psycho. I have a really hard time finding things that he says that I don't agree with 100%. His irreverence toward something sacred doesn't sit well with me, but I am not convinced that he's being irreverent. I think his message is all there; What would Jesus buy? He calls the playstation, nintendo wii and other such products 'the devils of today'. I can certainly see how that is the case.

OK, exercising the cash register was a little weird. I think this guy speaks truth, but for some reason I have judged his attitude to be irreverent. Maybe it is my attitude that is not open enough to accept someone speaking from the heart in his own style.

And so this guy disturbs me. On the one hand I can't handle his irreverence and on the other hand, I suspect that he is being completely reverent and serious in a way that I am unable to understand.

OK, it also disturbs me that he has put out a movie that he sells... that seems like a difficult product to promote.

Family stuff

2009-08-02T19:16:00.003-06:00

I'm excited about my next post. It will be a bit of a spin off from the previous one, but first I have finally recharged the battery on the camera and will now proceed to download pictures and maybe a video or two.

The three boys sitting and eating on a hike.

Shackleton conducting a symphony of wildflowers.
This kid's faces never cease to surprise me. I have no idea what he was doing.

This is Caden with one of his chicks (they are much bigger now). He's very proud that he's big enough to hold them.
This is one of those accidental photos that really turns out well. OK, it's a mediocre photo at best, but look closer and see if you can find the humor in the newspaper.

OOh, and I have some video.

I want to be a preacher

2009-07-29T19:37:00.002-06:00

I really enjoy my job and what I get to do for people, but that doesn't mean that I don't think about other opportunities. For example, someone commented to me a while back that they thought I would make a good preacher. This was a real compliment coming from a preacher who I respect and admire a lot, but I'm not so sure.

The biggest problem with me becoming a preacher is that my religious views and church affiliation are with a church that has an unpaid clergy. It's very difficult to support a family with a full-time voluntary position. So I couldn't really be a 'preacher' for my church and I believe in my church so it would be a little weird to be a preacher for a different church.

Hold on, I've really thought about this. My desire to be a preacher doesn't revolve around the religious aspects. I really like the idea of being able to dedicate my life to helping people in need. I could spend my days in nursing homes visiting people who are lonely. I could prepare a speech once a week to provoke thought and encourage people to improve their lives and be kinder to those around them. I could help people work through the darkest, most difficult times of their lives, providing them with random acts of service and organizing or helping them find the help that they need. I could be paid to give hugs and love people. That's my dream job.

I've thought about professions that sort of mimic my dream job, but nothing quite fits. I could be a counselor, but the whole idea of someone paying me to talk with them and serve them somehow defeats the purpose. I could go into nursing or elder care (which I have done and very much enjoy), but you don't get the time that you need to dedicate to the people. It's all about solving the health problem and moving onto the next patient because the more patients you can see the more MONEY you can make. So the fact that what they really need is someone to talk to doesn't matter. The profession tract doesn't seem to fit what I want to do.

I've also thought about starting a sort of company being a preacher for those who don't have a belief system. That wouldn't compete with my beliefs and I could give an inspirational thought once a week on Wednesdays and go around to my non-believing congregation providing service through the week, helping them with whatever they may stand in need of, loving them and giving them hugs. I think it's a great idea, except that I have my doubts about how the finances would work.

In a regular church people pay a tithe or something like it to the church so the church can provide a building, services, etc. If I were a non-church preacher, I think I would have a hard time convincing people to give me 10% of their income. The rich people would figure out that they would have better results for less money with a shrink and the poor people wouldn't be able to pay me enough to support my family. Maybe I'm just being pessimistic, maybe I should give it a shot.

I have concluded that the next best thing is working at a non-profit gym where I get to serve people of all financial backgrounds and help give them the tools to improve their health. I really do love the people I get to work with, but hugs aren't exactly appropriate. I still wish I could go to homes and provide help as needed. I actually get to deal a little with people's hard times and help them through it, but not nearly to the extent that I wish I could. (Surprisingly, personal training type jobs are ~50% cheerleader, ~40% counselor and ~10% knowing something about exercise and being able to help people improve their health.) So if you have any ideas on starting "Sans' church", let me know.

As soon as we get the battery in the camera recharged I will post pictures.... I think

dirty animals

2009-07-04T19:06:00.003-06:00

I'm excited about my chickens. First, I think chickens were the next step in our sustainable lifestyle. I just hope I don't kill them. One thing I'm really excited about was their coop. I built the coop from an old picnic table that came with our house. We had to buy some things to complete it, but the picnic table was almost completely recycled into the coop. I wish I had taken pictures to show how.

Tonight I want to blog about dirty animals. When I tell people that we got chickens, I often hear that they are dirty, stinky animals. While I'm not going to deny that, I would like to put it into perspective.

Let's compare my chickens to the people who walk their dogs in front of our house. My chickens produce A LOT of poop. All of that poop can be composted into some of the best fertilizer possible for my garden. I get some leftover wood products as flooring, the chickens poop in it, I let it sit for awhile and compost and then I put it on my tomatoes and it helps them grow. The people with the dog, on the other hand, carry around a plastic bag (a petroleum product), wait for the dog to poop, pick it up in the plastic bag, carry it back home and put it in the trash. The trash man then drives his stinky truck to their house and takes the dog poop with the trash to the dump where it very slowly rots along with the other municipal waste that pollutes the dump.

The only thing that makes cats any better is that the owner doesn't follow the cat around waiting for it to poop. The cat goes to the litter box and does his thing in peace. Still the owner will eventually gather the cat poop in a plastic container and send it for a stinky ride to the dump to rot.

Even cats and dogs that live outdoors and don't have humans that collect their bodily waste don't produce anything of worth (like fertilizer or eggs).

So I've been thinking about this. Chickens are considered 'dirty' animals, but for some reason cats and dogs aren't. Yet when you look at what is done with the animal byproducts it really seems that cats and dogs are far dirtier. So what gives, why is there a discrepancy?

Ultimately my ideas turned to the separation of people from consequences. I'm thinking that if dog owners had to compost the animal waste and make it useful, they would find their animals to be dirtier. Since they are able to contain the mess in a convenient petroleum product and send it away they then don't have to think about it. It is more difficult to get the chicken mess sent away, therefore the chickens are considered dirty. It's not that the chickens themselves are really dirtier, but rather the mess is more difficult to get off the property.

Interestingly, that is the same reason that people still buy eggs from a huge chicken farm and meat from slaughterhouses. If they really had to experience the consequence of their actions, most would not want to participate. If they had to see the living conditions of the chickens or cows that are used to mass produce their food, they would recognize the real cost of what they are eating. I think we would have more vegetarians in the world if people understood their impact on animals.

It sounds like I'm going to burst into some PETA type rant and I'm far from that, but I also know there are serious health ramifications in eating products raised they way our mass produced animal products are raised.

I'm still going light on the computer, but I am back... sort of.

I'm out

2009-06-25T20:28:00.002-06:00

I just started a new book called, "Better Off" It's about an MIT grad student that moves into a 'minimite' community. He has no power, relies on his garden and land to provide food and money to support him and his new wife. I love the idea.

The book is extremely well written and unlike most 'anti-stuff' material, the guy doesn't come across as arrogant or holier than thou. At least not yet.

So far my favorite part of the book was when he described the coming of technology. It began with Locke who philosophized a lot about ownership and possessions. The idea of ownership and having something that others do not almost gives that 'something' a persona. That 'thing' is now prized as would be a relationship it is something special and different. It's something that I have and you don't and it makes us different.

As technology grew and these 'things' grew persona, they did not really play by the traditional rules. The author sites a couple of guys were were harshly punished for destroying a piece of machinery that had replaced them on the farm.

This technology was something that the land owner had and used exclusively. He didn't let others use it because it was his. This technology stole from the two men their livelihood. It stole their income and self-worth. It left them with nothing, including no skills to find employment because technology had taken it. So they destroyed their boss' technology so they could have what they felt was rightfully theirs, their jobs.

Had the two men injured someone who had stolen from them they would have been able to make a plea for self-defense, but because it was a machine that plays by different rules, that almost seems an inapplicable plea.

We have Deified technology. We have placed it above the law and we spend most of our waking hours (and in many cases sleeping hours) worshiping it. Technology has become the god that we don't understand, yet that we depend upon completely. It's a true crutch in a world that often considers religion a crutch.

Some of those ideas were the authors, others I expounded on. If you really want to know what he said, read the book.

Here's where I'm going with this. I think it is time for me to take a leave from the internet. Honestly, this falls on my wife's birthday (tomorrow) and that is not a coincidence. I will spend at least a week away from this blasted computer (although I still have to use one at work). I haven't been blogging a ton recently, so I have no idea when I'll be back. I would still like to post pictures and express ideas here, but I want to spend less time surfing and otherwise worshiping a god that I don't believe should have any power in my life.

So ultimately as a birthday present to my wife I'm going to spend more time building relationships with family and less time doing whatever it is that I do on the computer.

new stuff

2009-06-14T20:34:00.002-06:00

We made some new friends and our friends are getting chickens. The way it works out, they are getting way more chickens than they actually need. So they will be giving us some chickens. I will be working on a chicken pen here shortly.

I also wanted to post a video for your viewing pleasure. Or at least so that you can see what our boys do. If you're interested.

Certifications

2009-06-14T19:32:00.002-06:00

Yesterday I went to an all day training to be certified as a SilverSneakers instructor. Since I don't think that it's possible to fail, I guess I passed the course. I can now teach classes that are branded with the SilverSneakers label.

I think this is an interesting process. I have all but a PhD in exercise science, yet I had to take this class to be able to teach a senior exercise class. Does anyone else see some irony in that? I feel qualified to help create the SilverSneakers program, yet I have to take a class to teach it. I'm really not bitter and I actually don't feel like I should be teaching the classes anyway. I have all the knowledge that I need to teach, but I lack rhythm. Apparently rhythm is important if you are going to teach an exercise class to music.

Anyway, the point that I want to make goes well beyond SilverSneakers. My master's degree was an exercise physiology, nutrition blend. I was actually only a couple classes short of a combined degree. I opted not to take the classes because it would have prolonged my time there and it wouldn't have mattered anyway. Taking the classes and then pursuing a RD would have been beneficial, but it requires a long unpaid internship that was not feasible with a family. So I have more bookwork education than most dietitians, although I am lacking the internship (and that certainly is important), yet I am not able to give nutritional counseling because of liability concerns.

I had a client at my health club who had blood sugar levels that would skyrocket after exercise. She says that it baffled her doctors and I found the cause. That is more specifically my area of expertise than most doctors are educated. Yet, I can't provide council or advice because I'm not an MD and I don't have the appropriate certifications. It's a liability issue.

I understand the need for certifications, but frankly, I think they are absurd. It is as if our society encourages people not to think for themselves. You have to go to an "expert". But I am an expert in some fields, except I haven't paid the money to get the certifications that "prove" that I'm an expert.

Therein lies the basis of certifications. it's all about generating money. Before yesterday I knew a lot about exercise in seniors and I knew that I didn't have any rhythm. After paying money to take an 8-hour course I didn't learn anything new about exercise in seniors and I still don't have rhythm. The only thing that has changed is that I have less money and they have more money, therefore I am highly qualified to teach a class that I wasn't qualified to teach before.

Same thing goes with the RD. I was unwilling to provide free labor for the beginning couple of months of my practical learning, therefore I am not qualified to be a dietitian. Honestly, I feel that my knowledge base is insufficient to provide in depth nutrition counseling, but I know my weaknesses and I know that I could obtain the needed information without doing an unpaid internship. I will never by an RD without giving them that money.

I by no means think that I have the appropriate education to be a medical doctor, but there are areas in which I have done more study than most family practice MDs. Insulin resistance happens to be one of those areas. Most doctors don't know that glucose can get into muscle cells in complete absence of insulin through some mechanical mechanisms. They don't know the role of insulin and the insulin/glucagon ration on hepatic cells, and muscle cells.

Rain Barrels

2009-06-05T19:17:00.002-06:00

I've recently installed rain barrels on our house. There is one connected to each of the downspouts on the front of the house. I thought it was a phenomenal idea; the barrels collect rain from the roof so I can water the garden when it gets dry. Not only that, but I don't have to mess with the downspouts that dump water next to my leaky basement.

Thus far it hasn't been a complete success. I have two 55 gallon rain barrels that collect the rain from just the front half of the roof. On the first night after installation it rained. I was really excited as I heard the big storm that night just knowing that my barrels were filling with water that I could use in the garden. Both barrels overflowed that night.

That was a pretty big storm, so I was excited to have some rain stored for the dry days to follow. Except the following days weren't dry. It doesn't take much rain to overflow an already full rain barrel.

So the rain barrels overflowed for a bit, thereby allowing the water to collect right next to the leaky basement (which hasn't leaked for us yet). Then one day it was dry! I took my watering can and filled it up from the rain barrels. (I installed spigots at the bottom of the rain barrels so that water removal is easy). It didn't take me long to note that a 1 gallon watering can doesn't empty a 55 gallon barrel very quickly. I need a bigger watering can. I got a little bit of water of the barrels, but not nearly enough. They both overflowed with the next rain.

At this point I was getting pretty worried about our basement leaking. We've heard that it does and I know that if I dump enough water right next to the house it will leak. So I drained the water from the barrel that I was worried about well away from the house. Luckily that wasn't a difficult process. It hasn't rained since. So now things are looking like they'll be dry for awhile and I've only got half the water I could have had.

I've been considering options for the future. I could buy more barrels and hook up several barrels in tandem to collect more rain water, but that would cost more money. Those barrels aren't cheap even though they we've found a good place to buy them used. The less expensive option would be to simply install an overflow pipe that directed the water away from the house. That would be cheap and easy, but I'd be missing all that rain water.

I think I'm going to have to buy more barrels anyway because I currently only have one compost bin. If we keep adding stuff to it there is no way it will ever finish composting. If we stop adding things to it we won't have anywhere to put our compost for at least several weeks.

We'll figure something out.

Research

2009-06-01T19:51:00.002-06:00

I have some experience in academic research. I've published some papers and been to some conferences. I've read tons of papers that others have written and quite frankly it's nearly impossible to determine if the paper you are reading has any merit at all.

I've worked with some incredible scholars who are full of integrity. They conduct research following the scientific method and they try to draw conclusions and make inferences from the data collected.

The majority of researchers I have worked with have an agenda. They know the results that they want to find before they conduct the research and they design the 'experiment' to provide the results they want to see. It is easy to overlook large bodies of contradictory evidence when you don't want to see it. Frankly, it is nearly impossible to conduct non-biased research in an area where you have strong opinions.

Why does it matter that most research is not actually research, but rather a bundle of money spent to build the ego of a guy who is able to design research projects that 'prove' his opinion. As a person who looks for primary sources for information, this is a concern of mine, but for the average consumer, it really doesn't matter.

You see, most people wait for the watered down version of research. They wait for a journalist to read a research article, dumb it down and input his/her own biases before they read it. By the time 'research' reaches the public it may not even resemble truth.

I was once interviewed by a popular magazine on some research that I had conducted. I was glad to see that they took the time to email me and verify that what they had written agreed with the research that I had conducted. Most journalists don't do that. It is important to note that when the journalist wrote me, he had completely misinterpreted the research I had conducted.

There we have it; we use second hand information that is generally misinterpreted from primary research that was conducted to build the ego of some researcher. And what do we use this information for? We use this information to make some of the most important decisions of our lives. We decide what is healthy and what is not and we rely on this information to help us in virtually all aspects of our lives.

No wonder the Atkin's Diet seemed like a good idea. Here, I'll give you a specific example. I've seen it reported that the Atkin's diet has been shown to lower cholesterol levels. Did you also know that any diet that puts you in a caloric deficit can improve cholesterol levels? Did you know that in the study on the Atkin's diet that subjects were given fishoil supplements? Did you know that fishoil supplements have been shown to improve cholesterol levels? By putting all of these things together in the same study, the study doesn't really show anything. Yet, most of us have heard that people on the Atkin's diet lower their cholesterol levels.

There is good research out there, it is just difficult to identify. In fact, I have found researchers that were reputable and whose work I trusted, only to find some complete junk science that they had conducted that made me distrust everything else they had published.

This is part of the reason I dropped out of a PhD program. I don't like the dishonesty in science. This is also important when it comes to global warming research and research on genetic engineered foods. Did you know that because Monsanto has a patent on many genetically engineered strains of vegetables, you cannot conduct research without their permission? It's not even possible to get unbiased research on many strains of genetically engineered foods.

Those are my thoughts on research.

Progressive

2009-05-29T20:06:00.003-06:00

I was out mowing the lawn this afternoon and a lady walked by with her kids. She looked at me with my reel mower and said, "doing things the old fashion way?" I didn't hear her, but my wife responded in the affirmative. I noticed that a conversation had taken place, so I inquired of my wife. She told me that the lady thought I was old fashioned.

I thought mowing with a reel mower was progressive. I sometimes like to think that I'm progressive. I told my wife that. In all of her wisdom she responded, "You are progressive, but nobody knows it yet".

I actually do think of myself as progressive and I think the next step is a step back. I see people dependent on their cell phones and other electrical devices and I don't think those things are helping society. The step forward, the progressive step is a step away from dependence on unnecessary technology.

Free stuff

2009-05-27T20:25:00.002-06:00

People like free things, it makes them think they are getting something for nothing. When will people recognize the cost of free items?

I organized a health fair and made sure that all of the 'vendors' had some sort of screening or activity beyond giving out brochures and stuff. People seemed to still just want the stuff. I've been to health fairs and conventions before and I have gone home with stuff. I never look at it again. No matter how good my intentions, the pamphlets in the bag never get read.

While it is possible that I'm the only person who has that problem, I expect that many trees are thrown away or recycled at conventions and health fairs. The 'free' stuff that people take is certainly costing somebody something. It costs the company. So why does the company give it out?

I would assume that someone somewhere did the math and decided that 4 out of every 100 people who take a brochure will buy something (I completely made that number up, it could very well be 96 out of 100). It is therefore worth the trade-off. The four people that buy something pay for the 100 pamphlets to be printed. It's a numbers game and it's worth the waste.

There has to be a better way.

There is an interesting phenomenon with free services. I work in a health club. We have exercise classes that cost money to take. They are generally popular and people pay for them and attend. We also have free classes, but they never progress, they stay at the same level so that anyone can drop in and participate. We have tried to make some classes free, but still allow a progression through the class. We had people sign up for the classes, even though they didn't have to pay. At the end of the 8-12 week sessions, only a few people would continue to attend the free classes.

People don't value free things. I think we should start charging for things that used to be free. No more freebies. Pay for plastic bags at stores. Pay for brochures. Pay for samples at Costco. These things don't have to cost a lot, maybe even just a few cents, but putting a cost to them will reduce waste. And yes, taking a sample that you don't need at Costco is waste, you just happen to be using your body as the garbage can.

Lots to post about

2009-05-24T14:00:00.004-06:00

I think regularly about things I want to post, but I just haven't been taking the time to post recently. Part of the problem is that I am fairly certain that I have lost 80% of my readers (I used to have 5, now I'll be lucky to have 1). The other part of the problem is that I haven't really had the time to develop the thoughts. It seems that I am preoccupied.

One thing I thought of posting about was a the ice cream truck idea that my oldest son put together. In short, the neighbors gave us a tricycle that has a little basket on back for our youngest son. Our oldest son thought this looked like it would make a good ice cream trike and prepared to go sell Popsicles in the neighborhood. He persisted, so we put the cooler in a trailer and gathered the other kids on bikes and went around selling Popsicles. It would have been a fun little post, but I couldn't figure out the point that I wanted to make. (Believe it or not, I try to make a point with what I write.) We sold 7 popsicles (after many failed attempts) at $.50 each. The boys got to split $3.50 for their ~2 hours of work. They feel like the richest kids ever.

I've thought about posting about my new job which I love, but I don't feel that it is appropriate to post about your employer on a private blog. I'm not an official spokesman and I certainly have opinions so I feel it's best leaving professional and private life separate in the blog world.

On a similar note, I have thought of posting about the doctoral program that I left. I have been enlightened about the volume of 'politics' that occur at Universities and am gravely dissappointed. Maybe someday I'll expound, but not now.

I could write about cycling, but I have a 3 mile uneventful commute every day. I've gone on a couple of Saturday morning bike rides with friends, but they have been generally uneventful.

The topic that has really been dominating my thoughts sort of flirts with many of the areas I've thought about writing about. We are attending a new church congregation and it is in a quite affluent area. The people are very kind and we have been treated great. It is one of the nicest congregations I've ever been in. I just don't feel like I fit in. (Granted, I haven't felt like I fit in anywhere in the last several years.)

I doubt that we make less money than everyone else in the congregation, but we certainly make less than most. I know this because most of the people in our congregation live in houses that cost over half a million dollars.

The amount of money people make has been on my mind. It shouldn't be, I really don't care, but it is. I have had lots of really good friends who make far more money than me and it generally doesn't bother me. I think the feeling of not fitting in comes through conversations that I have with people. Typical conversation will inevitably lead to someone asking what you do for a living. I work for the YMCA.

In the beginning I said that with nothing but pride. I work for the YMCA. I love what I do and I get to make a difference. I am passionate about what I do and feel that I really make a difference in the lives of real people who need help. (those previous links were to the same video, this one is also good.)

It didn't take long for me to notice similar responses to the fact that I work at the YMCA. They seem disappointed, or surprised that I would 'settle' for a job at the YMCA. I enjoy what I do, I just don't make a lot of money. Why does it matter how much money I make? Evidently it matters some because either people have made a big deal of it or I have perceived them making a big deal about it. (I should emphasize that nobody here has been anything but kind. I just spend a lot of time feeling judged.) Unfortunately, I have started talking about my degrees to 'prove' that I'm above a YMCA job.

That last sentence is really what confuses me. I feel that I do find myself talking about degrees in order to prove something, but I don't hold a lot of value in the PhD that I didn't finish (that's why I didn't finish). I also sometimes find myself thinking that I'm 'above' a YMCA job. I love what I'm doing. How can I be 'above' the job that I love? Oh the hypocracies that I have to live with.

I went for a bike ride the other day with guys from my new church congregation. It was good. They make more money than me, but we got along fine. They invited me to do a ride in a couple of weeks, you know, the type of ride that you have to pay to do. I said that we couldn't afford it, but thanks for the invite. That was sort of true, but not entirely. We could afford it, but we choose not to so that we can stay out of debt and spend our money on things more important to us like our garden or savings. Anyway, the guys I was riding with decided they would offer to pay for me to do this ride. It was a kind and generous gesture, but I would feel bad taking money to do a ride that I could have afforded but chose not to because we have different priorities. I actually have a prior engagement that day, so it doesn't really matter, but it's an interesting discussion.

Overall, everything is going great. I love what I do and it provides enough money that I don't have to worry about it excessively. I have an incredible family and the greatest wife possible. Life is good. I will try to return to blogging as I have more time, I still think it's good to stay on top of my writing abilities.

Here are some pictures of the family for those who may be interested.

What an excited little boy! I'm not completely sure where his clothes are, but we've got about 50 pictures on the camera of this little boy with no shirt. Someday we'll get him dressed.
He's still excited and still doesn't have a shirt on. Notice the dinger on his forehead. He was pounding on the screen door, which he likes to do, but the screen door wasn't latched so he did a header out the front door, down a step and onto the concrete. As Homer said, "He took the earth full on the forehead." I'm going to post a video from a few days earlier where this dinger was far worse. Six-Pence certainly likes that his brother had a birthday. He got to eat cake. We didn't get many pictures of the birthday boy. He was making awful faces and then we ran out of batteries.
Something certainly seems to be good.

Here's the birthday boy. The Mugwump turned six. This is the only picture where he's not making a ridiculous face at the camera, largely because you can't see his face. He enjoyed the cake and his birthday.

Here are the videos that we've recently made. Be careful not to play the first one at high volume or CPS will come take your kids away, there is a lot of screaming. The second one is just documentation of bad manners. I don't know where he could have possibly picked up that habit.

Mother's Day

2009-05-09T07:32:00.002-06:00

I want to post today on Mother's Day. Frequently, people get their mothers flowers for Mother's Day. While that is nice and all to get your mom something pretty, really I think it's a bad idea. Why would you get your mother something that is pretty for awhile and then wilts and dies? I just don't like the symbolism there.

You can get your mother a potted plant or tree that will live on for some time. That's pretty good symbolism and a thoughtful gift. But I have something better. I think you should get your mother a cow. (I'm currently envisioning my mom receiving a cow and figuring out what to do with it since she lives in a motor home).

Hindus worship the cow as a symbol of maternal nurturing. Think about it, the cow provides milk for sustenance, power for work and dung for fuel. When cow dung is burnt it releases a natural mosquito repellent and the ash makes a great fertilizer. For many of the Hindu people the cow nurtured their life more than almost anything else; just like a mother. So I think you should get your mom a cow for mother's day.

Oh, and don't get her a card. We don't need to support Hallmark in any way.

I recently heard a story on NPR that was wonderful. I think you should read it. (I tried to find an MP3 version, but failed).

Happy Mother's Day to all mothers out there. I even think higher of mothers than I do of cows. Thanks for nurturing the world and making it a better place.

Buying new furniture

2009-05-06T20:34:00.002-06:00

We bought a futon about 4 years ago that we have used as a living room couch ever since. We now have a family of 5 and just one couch. While I really like the futon, the whole family barely fits on it. Then if we have company someone has to sit on the floor. We decided that it's time to have real living room furniture.

We had a couple criteria for our furniture. We wanted it to be green. I haven't got a clue how to decipher what goes into furniture as far as chemicals etc, so that was going to be tough. The other major criteria was that the furniture had to fit me. You see, when you sit on a couch with your knees against the couch, your hips are still several inches away from the back of the couch. Most couches force you to slouch. That drives me nuts. So I had to find a couch that would not force people to slouch in it, but would still be comfortable.

We went to several stores looking for the perfect couch. Couches that fit real people don't seem to exist anymore. We therefore looked at used furniture places. This also helped us find 'green' furniture. We ended up at Habitat for Humanity. And we happened upon an Amish made couch and love seat. Evidently they were custom made and painted black, but the buyer changed his mind. The Amish store that made them does no carry painted furniture, so they donated the furniture to Habitat for Humanity. This was a $3300 couch and love seat that was drastically reduced at a second hand store. With that said, it was by far the most expensive furniture in Habitat for Humanity.

I was extremely grateful today to be able to not only get new, green furniture, but to be able to make a substantial 'donation' to Habitat for Humanity. I got a couch that fits real sized people that is really well built for less money than a new living room set that they have at the stores. It's not very often that I feel good about spending as much money as we spent, but I feel really good about it.

pictures

2009-05-03T17:14:00.002-06:00

I'm going to post pictures. I'm glad to be back on my bike commuting daily. It feels good and now I'm exploring a little to find longer routes so I can get a little more distance in. I work at a gym, I would hate to have to work out there as well.

I also recently built a compost bin for the back yard. We got a used syrup barrel, probably from Pepsi. I drilled some holes in it, stuck a big pipe through the middle and stuck it on some 4x4s secured in the ground. The thing doesn't look great, but it works just fine.

Now for pictures.

This is the Mugwump and Jaguar on a hike that they went on this week. Kentucky is really a pretty state. It is extremely green!
This is Six-Pence making a fabric collage. He was pretty proud of it.
My wife took the boys to an activity where they were allowed to paint a car. It is unclear whether Jaguar got any of the paint on the car, but he had a lot of fun.
I wasn't overly excited to find that the little one can climb. This is a bridge over the creek by our house. While he certainly couldn't climb over the rail, it makes me a little nervous that he can climb it at all.
The Mugwump wants to grow long hair. It got pretty shaggy, but he let us cut the sides so it looks a little better. I think I need to go do haircuts right now. Mine is getting to the point where I have to pat down parts that stick up if I don't take a shower. That has to change, so I'll shave it.

Keeneland

2009-04-18T19:14:00.002-06:00

My wife was out of town this weekend to attend a homeschooling conference. While she was out, I got some great weather and lots of time to spend with my three boys. We're new to the area, so I really don't know the things to do in town, but I do know that the horse races are on at Keeneland for the month of April (and October, but we haven't been here for an October yet).

So we walked to the bus stop and caught the bus to Keeneland for a day at the races. Actually, I just thought it would be fun to let the boys see the horses.

In many ways the races were just as stereotyped, but in other ways I was shocked. I had imagined Keeneland as a place of fancy dresses, big weird looking hats and money. All those things were true. Most people were dressed up. I don't know how to explain it. I dress up on occasion, as does my wife, but this was different. Lots of pastel colors, lots of bow ties and lots of women in dresses that didn't require a lot of material. It wasn't formal wear. It wasn't something you would see at church or a wedding. It was different. Maybe I could just call it 'uppity casual' except that the people wearing it seemed more like they were pretending to be uppity than actually having money.

I think this idea of people pretending to be uppity was where my shock came in. I expected to be among rich people in a new social situation fancier than I'm used to. That is a part of horse racing. I've seen it in the movies and I expected it. What I didn't expect was the poor behavior. When I think of the wealthier parts of society, I think of people who have been well educated and know how to handle themselves in social situations. I think of sipping wine and having intellectual conversation. I think of well mannered people being entertained while they try to make a buck betting on horses.

In reality, what I found was the most foul mouthed, rudest group of spectators that I've been around. Don't misunderstand, hockey fans can certainly be drunk and rude, but it's almost expected. They also seem to be able to control their language around kids. I was expecting far more from the horse racing crowd. In my short time there, I had at least a half dozen people spill beer on me or my kids and I can't even begin to count the vulgarities being yelled in the area. Horse racing doesn't all take place in one location. First you have to walk to the ring where they show the horses and then you have to walk back to the track where the race occurs and then back to the ring in preparation for the next race. There was almost as much pushing and shoving as you would see at a European Football match (that's an exaggeration, but there was still no way to navigate with three kids). I was disappointed to say the least.

I wonder if it has always been that way. I wonder if the fan base of horse racing has always 'pre-gamed' in the parking lot to get drunk before the races. I wonder if there was a time when the wealthier people were really there hanging out in their fancy clothes rather than a bunch of college students who had been to Good Will and gotten outfitted in way too much pastel. Or has it always been a place where classes mix and get drunk together.

Anyway, the boys and I enjoyed one race and then we went and walked around in the barns. It was nice to see the grungy working folk. I felt better able to relate to them, although I doubt that I spoke the correct language. A gentleman invited the boys to pet his horse and we got to look at lots and lots of horses in their stalls. I think the barns were the best part of the day.

Then we caught the bus and returned home. It was a full day on the town for $7. $1 each way for the bus and $5 admission for the horse races. And I didn't have to fight traffic for a single moment.

pictures and video

2009-04-15T19:37:00.008-06:00

If all goes well, I'll be providing a variety of photos of the family and recent home improvement projects.

Let's begin:This is the new play thing in the basement.
The Youngest, Jaguar.
Middle kid, he wasn't as photogenic as he usually is.
Mugwump, the oldest. He still needs a haircut.
It's amazing how much fun can be had with a box.

Now I've got some videos that FINALLY finished uploading onto youtube.

Blog posts

2009-04-09T19:18:00.002-06:00

I haven't posted in awhile. I've been trying to think of things to post, but haven't been able to. I ride 3 miles to work every day and 3 miles home. It's an easy ride and the drivers are wonderful so it has been thus far uneventful.

I love my job and am engrossed in helping others. The only problem with my job is leaving. There is so much that I want to do that I have a hard time getting out the door. People want to work with me early in the morning and late in the evenings and I have a hard time saying 'no' (I'm getting better).

At home I have tons to do. We have cleared some small unhealthy trees to brighten the yard, dug three raised beds, planted a variety of fruit trees, berries and grapes and been otherwise occupied in the yard. I built my wife a pantry for the kitchen last weekend (all except the making it look nice part). I have lumber in the garage to build the boys a really cool play thing downstairs and I hope to complete that this weekend.

I have completely lost track of most of the blogs I used to follow and I now toy a few minutes a day with Facebook, although it doesn't do much for me.

Now comes the question. Am I not thinking of blog topics because I'm so busy and actively involved in life that I don't need to blog as a means of distracting myself? Or am I so consumed with life that I don't allow myself to think deeper about things that are really important to me and spend time dealing with those thoughts in a blog?

I think it's an interesting irony that I have overcome my inability to find a blog topic by blogging about why I can't find a topic. I'll stop now and post pictures soon. The three people that still read this only come for the pictures anyway.

Irony

2009-03-20T15:01:00.003-06:00

I've already posted about the geographical irony here in Kentucky. I'm still riding my fixie and it's only 3 miles to work now. I still have more elevation change in that 3 miles than I did in my 10-12 mile commute in Utah. I figured it would be flat here, but I was sorely mistaken.

Today I recognized some more irony. The drivers here are great. Sure, the locals complain about them, but that's what locals do. In two full weeks of commuting and several long commutes from our apartment up north, I have not had a single encounter with a motorist. I haven't felt threatened, I haven't had anyone pass closely and I haven't been honked at. The commute here is through the downtown area, so there is a lot of traffic, wide multi-lane roads and fast speed limits. When I signal, cars yield and allow me to cross lanes of traffic to get into the turn lane. It's a great place to be on a bike, even though the roads are narrow and congested.

In Utah County, Utah (one of the most religiously oriented counties in the US) I was honked at at least weekly. I felt threatened every few days and had some serious close calls that were obvious intentional acts on the part of the motorist. I was intentionally shot by a shotgun while on a bike ride in Utah. I had things thrown at me on more than one occasion. Ironic that I feel safer on the roads of Kentucky than I did in Utah.

I realize that I've only been here a short time, but I feel that I've had enough interaction with cars that I've really been treated well considering the time period. I'm looking forward to some longer rides in nice weather.

Dilemma

2009-03-11T20:00:00.002-06:00

We have a wonderful new home that we love. Sure, it has it's issues, but we love it. The boys are enjoying Kentucky. They say that it's creaky (that refers to our house), but I think they may mean that it's creeky (that refers to the abundance of creeks in the area).

The only thing that my middle son wanted with a house was an umbrella. We tried to explain that we would not be getting an umbrella with the house, but he didn't get it. So we look at this house and what do we find in the rafters of the garage but a large umbrella. So my son gets what he wanted out of a house. He got a house that came with an umbrella.

So here's the dilemma. We have a large oak tree in our yard. It's a beautiful tree. It shades the south side of the house which would be good for keeping it cool in the summer and warmer in the winter. I also like trees because they change CO2 into oxygen. That's important seeing that CO2 is now considered a pollutant. The dilemma arises in that this great tree also shades the vast majority of the back yard which we wanted for a garden area. So do we cut down the tree and grow others in different places and have a garden or do we keep the big tree and sacrifice our garden.

We have a little time to decide because I don't know how to cut down a big tree. Especially not a big tree in close proximity to houses... like mine.

misestimations

2009-02-26T19:18:00.002-07:00

When we moved here I anticipated riding my bike every day. It is about 20 miles to work, which is not a super long bike ride. I generally don't have a problem averaging 20 mph if it isn't all uphill. I figured that I could do the commute in a little over an hour and it wouldn't be too bad.

Upon arrival I've determined that Kentucky is hilly. I am still commuting on my fixie and the hills are killing me. Not only do I get bogged down on the way up, but I can't spin fast enough on the way down the hills to go as fast as I should be going. In the end my 20 mile commute takes an hour and a half or more. If I take into account the time it takes to change clothes for the ride, it's nearly a two hour commitment each way to commute. That's more time that I'm willing to dedicated. I have a family that I'd really like to see. Commuting by bike transforms an 8 hour day into a 12 hour day. That's not OK.

The obvious solution would be to get a new bike. I've thought of that. I don't ride a fixed gear because it's a fad. In fact, I have the world's dorkiest fixed gear. I have the elegance and simplicity of a fixed gear with a lighting system powered by electricity generated from the front hub. I am considering getting a new bike, but I don't want to be rushed into it. I also want to have enough money to get what I want. My fixie was the perfect bike for my previous commute. The route was flat, the destination was a madhouse where I liked having a cheap bike that couldn't get too beat up, and I enjoy riding the bike. We are moving to the city soon, and I think my fixie may be a good choice again so I'm not getting rid of it yet. And since we're in the process of buying a house, I figure that a new bike purchase isn't a top priority.

I feel bad for misestimating. I really wish I didn't have to commute by car to work, but when I weight things out, the time with my family is more important.

P.S. Our house in Utah (the one we sold) closed yesterday and we're hoping to close on the house in Kentucky next week (the one we're buying). We are extremely excited about the house that we found and are looking forward to settling closer to work (2.8 miles instead of 20.7) a playground, a grocery store and everything else that we need.

Some things never change

2009-02-22T17:57:00.002-07:00

I am really enjoying Kentucky. The people are great, I have never felt so welcomed anywhere I have lived. I have, however, noticed that somethings never change, no matter where you go.

Jokes about the weather have been the same almost everywhere I have lived. "You know what they say about Kentucky (or Colorado, or Utah...) if you don't like the weather, just stick around 10 minutes and it will change". This joke gets old, especially since the conversation already isn't going anywhere once you've started talking about the weather. You see, the weather changes everywhere and it changes frequently. That is just how things work. To be fair, I don't remember this being said in Washington or Oregon. That is probably because it would give people unrealistic hope that it would stop raining.

"Kentucky (and Colorado, and Utah, and Washington, and Oregon) has the worst drivers I have ever been around." I've seen grown-ups really argue about this. "People where I am from drive a lot worse than people where you are from". It's right up there with, "My dad can beat up your dad". Everywhere you go, some drivers are good and some drivers are bad. Everyone has moments of inattentiveness, some just have more than others (like those with cell phones surgically affixed to their heads). Sure some cities have more 'bad' drivers than other cities, but not every city is the worst. In fact, I would estimate that only one city has the worst drivers. (I make that estimate based on my understanding of superlatives used in the English language).

OK, I'm done venting about little inconsequential pet peeves that I have. If you can explain either of these things to me, please do. I'll be back to talk more about the house we're going to buy sometime this week... Things are looking good.

A new house

2009-02-15T12:09:00.002-07:00

We put an offer on another house this week. We like this one better than the first one. We have decided to go with the house in the city. We found the perfect house. It is 2.8 miles from my work, which is a little disappointing because I was hoping for a slightly longer commute. I can live with it though because I can commute year around without any issue. The house is on a quite street, it's just off a somewhat busy street that is the main feeder for a subdivision, but the street that it sits on is a dead end street with only a dozen houses on it. The house is .4 miles from the nearest grocery store and there are sidewalks the entire way and you never have to cross a major road. It has a fairly small yard, but it backs up against a park with a creek running through it so the boys will have a place to play. I've been warned about the neighborhood, but am not concerned. It is not far from some rougher parts of town, but the night we looked at the house there were young families and single women walking on the streets well after dark. The concern that people have expressed has to do with cultural diversity, and based on what we saw at the local grocery store, it was more culturally diverse than other parts of town, but I don't see that as a bad thing. In fact, I want my kids to associate with various ethnic groups and know that we are all the same.

The house itself is bigger than we really need, but I like what it has. It has four bedrooms, but only one bathroom (my wife says that is OK because she's the only girl, the rest of us can go outside if it really becomes urgent). Most of the home has nice hardwood floors, but the upstairs bedrooms are carpeted and quite spacious.

The basement is enormous. It has a perfect mix of finished and usable for storage. It has an 'unfinished' laundry area that could also serve as a mud room (it has an outside entrance). The finished portion of the basement is far from the nicest basement you've ever seen, but it will make an incredible playroom for the boys. The basement may also serve as a makeshift bedroom on special occasions and when the attic rooms get too hot during the summer.

The kitchen is OK at best. It needs a new refrigerator and dishwasher. The cabinets are not great but all is functional. With a remodel it could be really nice. The bathroom is similar, it needs work but it's currently functional and it could be made quite nice with a little work.

Best of all, Lexington allows chickens in the city as long as you aren't breaking any of the nuisance laws.

It's at the edge of our price range, but it's the perfect house for us. Had someone else done the fixing up, we wouldn't have been able to afford it.

If everything goes as planned, we should end up with this house. We have come to an agreement with the seller and now we just have to go through the purchasing process (and our house in Utah has to successfully continue going through the process).

This buying process was enlightening. We avoided the 'bad parts of town' because we wanted to feel safe. While on the one hand, that is logical, if every good family avoids the 'bad part of town', that part of town will never get better. (I'm assuming that we are a 'good family', when in fact many may consider us the crazy people with 3 wild kids and chickens in the back yard). Why don't people buy houses with hopes of improving the neighborhood through their presence? If people made a serious effort in that regard and cooperated with other families in the effort, it could make for an extremely good investment.

The sociology of neighborhoods fascinates me. I really wish that racial diversity did not make people think an area was 'bad', because I don't believe that at all. On the other hand, I have to consider the racial diversity when I buy a house because of what other will think and how it will influence the resale value of my house. It's unfortunate.

So we have started the process of buying a house, and we're excited to be closer to everything.

Here's a video I found that is completely unrelated, but I thought it was funny. And we need a microwave, that's the connection to my post on a new house, it doesn't come with a microwave, so we need one and this video is about microwaves.

60 mph

2009-02-09T20:04:00.002-07:00

Before leaving Utah I never drove over 60 mph. I know that fuel economy is based heavily on how we drive. I drove like a little old lady and could get nearly 30 mpg in our minivan. Since I didn't drive much, I felt really good about driving slow and getting the most out of the miles I put on the car. In fact, before leaving Utah, I didn't ride alone in a car more than once every 8-12 months. Every mile on the car was done taking several people somewhere (thus the car was necessary).

Today driving home I found myself going 75 mph in a 70 mph zone (please don't report me). I know that I'm still far from being a dare devil or a thrill seeker, but that is uncharacteristic of me. I should be driving 60mph with really slow accelerations to improve gas mileage. It is even more important now because I drive alone every day. My gas mileage has gone down to 20mpg here in Kentucky.

My driving habits are a little dorky, but I'm OK with that. The question that arose in my mind as I was driving was, "why have my driving habits changed? Why am I allowing my gas mileage to plummet when I know the changes that I could make to improve it?" The answer... I want to get home to be with my family and if I drive faster it will make a difference in that aspect. That really pulls me to live closer to work.

Here's the issue. I know that I've blogged a lot about this and nobody probably cares, but it's on my mind so I'm writing about it. Crime in the parts of the city that we can easily afford is bad. We looked at a house (that we actually liked a lot) that was in our price range, but near a not so great part of town. A little research on line revealed that there had been a shooting at the end of that street last month. I can't live in a home where I don't feel comfortable taking a walk at night. That criteria pushes us into nicer neighborhoods which cost more. By the time we're in areas where we feel comfortable, the neighborhoods are these monstrosity things without sidewalks so we still can't walk anywhere. Why wouldn't I want to live outside of town (but still within cycling distance) if my family can't walk places anyway? That is the attraction to contributing to sprawl. Even though it's against everything I believe, I see no attraction to living in a huge non-walkable subdivision.

We're still looking for a place. We've found some places in town and we've found some places in the country that we want to take a closer look at. I'm really attracted to the city at this point (as long as we find the perfect house that is walkable and is close enough to a park that the kids can play outdoors).

Decisions

2009-02-07T21:28:00.002-07:00

My wife asked me today what my dream house would be. She found her dream house. It looks like a barn and costs twice as much as we could get financed. Actually I like the same house that she does, but it's not necessarily my dream house. I don't think I have a dream house. I have a dream. I dream of living a sustainable life. In fact, I would love to be able to live without going to the grocery store. I would like to grow my own food, get around under my own power and provide services that would benefit those around me.

At this point in my life that dream is not feasible. In fact, I think that dream would only be possible if I didn't have to work. Quite frankly, I like my job and don't want to leave it. What I do is a service to those who need it and I love doing it. So my dream house isn't even the most desirable thing for me right now.

I still haven't gotten to the part where I figure out what my dream house is. At this point my dream is to take a big step toward being more sustainable. I would love to commute by bike as I did at my last job. I would love to have a big garden. I want chickens. I think it would be fun to have goat instead of a lawnmower. I want to reuse gray water. I want to collect rain water from the roof. The thing is that I can't do it all. We had already figured that.

I can afford to do more of the things that I want to the further I live away from work. I cannot, however, commute by bike if I live too far out. The question becomes which is more sustainable, to live a long ways out and commute by motorcycle while making big steps to make my home sustainable or living in the city unable to afford to make the changes I want in my home and commuting by bicycle.

I really enjoy commuting by bicycle and would like nothing more than to continue, but I also want to learn how to do other things sustainably. I want to learn how to raise chickens and run a sustainable home. I think that education would be priceless and it would be nearly impossible to make that happen in the city. I would be excited about the opportunities of country living, but it would cost me my bike commute. The education that I need to reach my ultimate goal cannot reasonably be attained in the city, so I'm really leaning toward living far from the city and commuting. We'll see what happens.

A new house?

2009-02-03T19:18:00.002-07:00

We've been looking for a house. I think it's been a solid two and a half weeks now, so we're ready to buy something NOW! While patience may be a virtue, it doesn't happen to be a virtue that my wife or I were endowed with.

We've looked at things a long ways away and they offered quite a bit of land and quiet living. We looked at houses close to town and they were sort of walkable, but lacking character or were in bad parts of town.

Over the weekend we found a house that we got a little excited about. It was a little house on 1.5 acres 25 miles from my work. It wasn't walkable. It wasn't particularly quiet. We couldn't have chickens, and the neighbor's driveway went right down the middle of the property. In a lot of ways it was a good compromise (it was the first nice house we looked at), but in other ways it compromised everything that we were looking for.

Today we were going to look at two houses closer in. One was an inexpensive home in downtown Lexington. It was a small house on a small lot where we would not have had room for a garden. It was walkable to almost everything, but my wife went to the nearest grocery store and found that it was not in a great part of town. She came home and did some searching to find that there had been a shooting at the end of the block a month ago. We opted not to look at that house, even though it did look like a cute house with a lot of things that we wanted.

The house that we did look at today was fairly close to work (9-12 miles by bike, depending on the route). It is not on a big lot, but the neighbors used to have chickens (therefore I figure we could too). The house is OK; it needs paint and moldings and some cosmetic stuff on the inside, but the kitchen and flooring are really nice. It also has this fun little bonus room. The house is being advertised as a 3/4 bedroom, 2 bath house. How can a house have 3 or 4 bedrooms? Well, it has two traditional bedrooms that are fairly small, but sufficient. It has a third bedroom, the master bedroom that has an attached bathroom as well as an attached bedroom. So you have to walk through the master bedroom to get to the fourth bedroom (that does have it's own closet). While it's a little weird, I like the idea of my wife and I taking one of the smaller bedrooms and giving the three boys the two rooms to use as a sleeping quarters and a play room. If I were a kid with two brothers, I think it would be cool to have a bedroom attached to a playroom away from the rest of the house.

So we like this last house. It's not really walkable to anything, but it's quiet and I would be able to bike to work. My wife would probably have to drive with the kids due to the distance and narrowness of roads in the area. I think this is a far better compromise than the others that we've looked at. Give us another day or two and we might even put an official offer on the house.

Trivia answers and more

2009-02-01T13:34:00.003-07:00

Heffalump was correct on the trivia question, but failed with the bonus question. 'Minding your p's and q's' refers to movable type. Printers would have young boys come in the evenings to put the type away and they had to pay special attention to the p's and q's because the type was backwards and they could be easily mixed up.

The bonus question asked which rack they were on. Of course the letters were on the bottom rack, or in the 'lower case' because nobody could get an upper case P and Q confused even if they were backwards.

OK, onto videos. First, we'll excuse my wife for taking videos sideways. She didn't mean to, but it fit in the viewfinder better. There are some disadvantages to having a still camera that we use for videos as well.

The first video is of the new 1 year old in the house walking. The second is a video of the older boys putting the recent ice storm to good use.

Maybe I'll post some pictures too.
Look, the birthday boy wanted to share his cake. Actually he likes sharing most things that he has put in his mouth and drooled on for awhile.

Has anyone told him that his face could stick like that?

Nice tongue

Gutenberg Trivia

2009-01-28T14:40:00.002-07:00

I've been wandering around with a head full of random facts that nobody should really know or retain. I don't know why they float around in my head as they do, but I'm going to try to purge them by offering a little trivia. The winner will receive the pride of knowing that s/he got the answer correct. I will be posting a video of the birthday boy walking tomorrow, but I'm curious to see if anyone else has the same random facts floating around in their head.

You're a fly on the wall in Gutenberg's workspace and you hear him tell a couple of young boys to 'mind their p's and q's'. What was Gutenberg talking about? And as a little bonus/hint question, on which rack where they located?

I may also have some temperature trivia coming up after the birthday party tomorrow (I know, you can hardly wait).

Weather

2009-01-27T18:12:00.002-07:00

Whenever people talk about the weather it means that they don't have anything else to talk about...

So the weather here has been terrible. It snowed a few inches last night. When I woke up to go to work it was sleeting (that's when the rain freezes and little ice droplets hit the earth). Then in the warmth of the day (the high was ~28) it started raining, but then freezing on the ground. The parking lot at my work was covered in about 3 inches of solid ice when I left this evening.

Tonight it is supposed to rain until it gets colder and then it will snow. We're supposed to have a couple more inches of accumulation. I'm not completely sure what that means. I know what a couple inches of snow is, and that's easy to deal with, but a couple inches of ice is a more complicated situation. Snow plows can't plow it and cars can't drive on it. Actually, it was good that there was snow last night because that was the only thing providing traction on the roads today. I think it's funny that the weather forecasters can't tell us what is going to accumulate. It's especially funny since a couple inches of rain is a lot different than a couple inches of snow as far as total water content.

Tomorrow's objective is to post pictures of my youngest son walking... he's getting pretty good.

Where in the world is Sans Auto?

2009-01-22T18:58:00.002-07:00

The title has a double meaning. First off, I am wondering where I went. As we look at houses, those that are further away are looking more and more attractive. We are outside of bike commuting, but the homes and land are far more attractive. The last two years were great, commuting daily by bike and living almost entirely without a car. I'm afraid of losing my persona of "Sans Auto", I loved the lifestyle, however I have always dreamed of a house and small farm. Some people have to live on farms and grow food. I want to be one of them. One of the conditions I have made with myself is that if I have to drive to work, I will have enough land to grow food and sell it at a farmer's market. So where is Sans Auto? He may be on his way out. He may be moving to 'Avec Auto' (with auto) and 'Avec une ferme' (with a farm). We'll see where we're headed (I like how I moved from first, to third to second person in that paragraph that was all about one person).

Now I want to address our new home in Kentucky. We moved East. We now live in the Eastern time zone. You might say that we live in the east, but no. This really isn't the East. In the civil war Kentucky was a border state and based on climate is sometimes considered a Southern state, but no, Kentucky really isn't in the South. At one time Kentucky was on the Western frontier. That is obviously no longer the case, but I've heard Kentucky refered to as a western state. Technically Kentucky is located in the Midwest. Still that doesn't make sense to me. Nebraska is in the Midwest, Kentucky is east of that. So I still wonder, where in the world is Sans Auto?

photos

2009-01-18T13:01:00.004-07:00

Today I'm going to post pictures. I still haven't gotten pictures of my commute, but I hope to at some point. Every time I look through pictures to post, I find that my middle son is by far the most photogenic. So I've got three pictures of Sixpence, and one of the Mugwump and Jaguar.

The first photo is of the Mugwump coming down the slide at the playground outside our new apartment. Sixpence is also in the photo, but I'm not sure whether there was a collision at the bottom of the slide or whether the Mugwump was sitting on Sixpence's head the entire way down the slide. In either case, the Mugwump looks happy and Sixpence... Well, if he's sad you can't tell.

Then we have a picture of the little one. This is a picture of him at the park, but when we went to open a new bank account, he single handedly entertained about 8 female employees for a half hour or more. I can only imagine how much money he wasted as people who were supposed to be working were playing peek-a-boo, making faces or talking in baby talk to him.

Going with the park theme, this is Sixpence posing for a picture. From what I've seen (in the dead of winter) this should not be called 'The Bluegrass State', but rather 'The Browngrass State'.

I think this is a wonderful picture of Sixpence. He was extremely tired, but check out that hair! We really like his hair longer instead of short, but we don't know how to cut it without buzzing it. So we let it grow. At some point he'll start looking like a girl and we'll have to do something, but for now I think this kid has the coolest hair ever.
I really hope to get pictures of my commute. I honestly can't think of a prettier ride and I'm excited to brag a little about the ride that I get to take on a regular basis (except tomorrow, it's currently raining/snowing and tomorrow's high is supposed to be 27).

If this works, I'm also going to put in a video of each kid here at the bottom. Excuse the pornographic images.

I'm "one of them"

2009-01-15T20:00:00.003-07:00

We've moved. I love my new job, I love the Lexington area, and I love the people. So far this has been a wonderful move for me and my family. I anticipate that it will remain a good move, but I have not been in the least bit disappointed.

OK, I've been a little disappointed, but it all revolves around my cycling. I have a great commute through some of the most spectacular scenery you could imagine, but I have only done it once in the last two weeks. I've had pretty good excuses most of the time. I drove on my first day because it was the first day and my family proceeded to tour the city while I was at work. I drove on the second day because my dad had a flight and he refused to ride with his luggage on my handlebars.

Wednesday and Thursday of last week was cold and snowy. I don't mind riding in the cold and snow, but not on unfamiliar roads. This week has either been really cold or I started early. If I'm supposed to be at work at 6 and it takes an hour and a half to ride it and I like to give myself a little extra time in case I get a flat or something. Suddenly I was going to have to wake up while the first number on the clock was a 3. I'm a morning person, but that's too early.

I've also struggled with logistics. There are no lockers at work that can be used overnight. That means that I have to pack everything in and out of work in my bag which is doable, but inconvenient. I don't like walking through buildings in my cycling shoes because I'm afraid they're going to eat up the flooring (or I'm going to fall on my butt and look like an idiot).

Today I decided it was too cold because I have been unable to find my cycling glasses with the clear lenses. With the temperature in the single digits, it's a recipe for frostbite, so that's a bad idea.

I've become a car commuter, "one of them". I'm unworthy of this blog and the title that it carries. I'm trying to change my ways, but I've become a car commuter with an excuse for every situation. I'm ashamed.

To make matters worse, as we look at houses I have been considering a permanent motorized commute. My wife and I have both dreamed of a house with a little land where we could have chickens, maybe a goat and a large garden that would provide much of our family's food. We can afford the house and land in the area, but it would be 20-25 miles from my work. If I'm going to have a garden, chickens, a goat and still see my family, I can't commute 3-4 hours a day by bike.

20-25 miles on a motorcycle or in an economy car could allow us to have our little piece of land that we've wanted. Then there's the thing with sprawl. I've taken urban planning and I understand principles of development and land management. Moving a little out of town for lower house prices and more room has been the downfall of MANY big cities in the US. I'm looking to be "one of them", part of the problem that I recognize and that is so preventable.

There are some smaller communities around here where we may be able to find a house on a little land that is within walking distance to what we need, within riding distance to work and still within our price range. My fear is that it will take four years to find that house and prices will have gone back up and interest rates will be approaching 10% so that we can't afford anything (I don't really think that housing prices or interest rates will go up that fast, but anything is possible in this economic climate).

I'm torn between what I really believe to be the way the world should be and what I want. Someone once asked me how I don't want things. I think that will be my next post. Either that or I'll find some pictures to post. I've been intending to do that for some time now.

The environmental movement

2009-01-13T19:14:00.002-07:00

I was walking through Krogers today (for you Westerners, that's a grocery store) and I saw a lady with a shopping cart containing about a dozen reusable grocery bags. I was excited and nearly invited her to be my friend on the spot, but figured that would be weird since we hadn't ever spoken.

Anyway, we ended up being on a similar route through the store, so we crossed paths many times. While I was excited by her evident understanding for the need to reduce the number of plastic bags entering landfills, I was disappointed by what she was putting in her cart.

While she probably didn't use a single plastic bag, I watched her put a box of Capri Sun in her cart. That was a plastic wrap surrounding a cardboard container that housed a half dozen disposable drink containers (along with the disposable straw that I can never get through that hole). Somewhere, I think she missed the point of the reusable bags in her cart.

The point is to minimize waste. Waste doesn't only come from plastic grocery bags.

I don't want this to come off the wrong way. I'm sure that she was a wonderful woman who had great intentions and may have even had a special occassion that necessitated Capri Sun. I know that we didn't take our reusable bags because we are out of garbage bags, so we reuse grocery bags for the purpose. Am I a hipocrite? Sure, but the point that I'm trying to make is that we can take far more action than the popular actions.

I hope to start posting a little more soon, but I've got a struggle. You see, I am struggling to ride to work regularly. First off, it's a long ways and the beginning of the year in a fitness field is a busy time. It's especially busy when you're new to the position, so I haven't quite settled into normal hours yet.

The problem is that I have a blog that goes by the title, "Sans Auto" meaning without car. I have always had a car, but I could say that I was without a car because my wife used it 90% of the time while I found other ways. Now, with the weather being cold and snowy and the route being long, unfamiliar and dark, I drive far more than I would like to. As we look for a house to buy, a reasonable bike commute is important. I think my next post will be about what we're looking for in our next house.

Small town

2009-01-10T15:18:00.002-07:00

We have safely arrived in Kentucky. I love my new job and all is well. The thing I'm most excited to post is a picture from my commute, it is spectacular. I haven't taken a camera along for the ride, so instead I'm going to post about a town in Wyoming.

We opted to take I-80 out of SLC because I-70 was getting hammered with a snow storm. It turned out to be an excellent decision. The weather was really pretty good as soon as we got out of Utah.

Of course everyone knows that weather is sort of a weird word to use for what happens in Wyoming. Sure, it snows and rains in Wyoming, but that is really seldom. I'd say that 90% of Wyoming's weather is wind. Is wind weather? Yes, but it's different.

We got out of the snow of Utah and got into the wind of Wyoming. Wind shouldn't influence driving conditions, but in Wyoming it does. As everyone knows, it only snows once year in Wyoming, the rest of the year it just blows the snow from one side of the state to the other.

So we were driving along and it was approaching white-out conditions due to the wind in Wyoming. I was driving the monstrosity truck and my wife was following in the minivan with the boys. I couldn't see much, so I decided to stop at the next exit. (My wife could see fine, she was just following an enormous yellow truck).

We pulled into a gas station in Elk Mountain Wyoming. We asked when the wind would die down so it would be easier to see. They said April. We hung out for about a half hour and ate lunch while we wandered around a really small dingy gas station.

There are about 150 people in Elk Mountain and 800 or so in another small town that wasn't too far away. Evidently there was a mine nearby and then the stores that supported the small mining town. Oh and the guys who plowed the roads, they also lived in these towns.

While there, I was able to overhear some conversation of the towns folk. The guy who plows the local roads came in and was talking about the job he had just applied for (you know, the only job opening in town). He had heard that 25 other people had applied for the job. He proceeded to name them and consider their qualifications one at a time. Some of the applicants evidently lived too far away and would have to move if they were given the job. The conversation then turned to where the new employee would live, if hired since there was just one place in the area that was available for rent, and that was up for argument.

As these guys talked I wondered about the small town life. It sure seems like you wouldn't have any privacy. Everyone seems to know everything about the rest of the town. I thought more about it and all these people are still here. Sure, it's economically difficult to move, but if it's that bad, there is a way to get out. And people don't seem to leave those small towns.

I think that it could be nice to live in a really small town. It could be a tight knit community where everyone is your friend. I think people like it. Knowing everyone around you could really offer some comfort. We're not moving to a small town anytime soon, but I think it has the potential of being a good thing.

The future's so bright...

2008-12-28T07:58:00.002-07:00

I'm still home. I'm in Denver. I have never lived in Denver, but I'm familiar with the area so I still feel like I'm home. I have lived in Washington, Oregon, Utah and Colorado. Since I've traveled from state to state, I have also spent a bunch of time in Wyoming and Idaho.

As we were leaving Utah yesterday someone asked if I had a map with me. No, I'm going to Denver. It's just like being home, I don't need a map. I could have used better weather, but a map wouldn't have fixed that. The roads were awful in Salt Lake City and then cleared up over the first pass. Then the roads were fine except for some icy spots and blowing snow in Wyoming. It was a little like 'home' was trying to hold us in.

We're spending a couple of days with my dad in Denver before we leave. When we leave, we'll be heading East. I've never really been East. The future lies in the East. I am excited to explore a new area. As I've been looking at the weather for our drive, it looks like it's going to be warm and sunny the entire way. I hope that's a good representation of the future.

Family traditions

2008-12-23T00:46:00.002-07:00

I made brief mention in my last post of family traditions that I like during the Christmas season. My favorite is our stockings. I would take a picture and show you (and I still may at some point), but the wire to connect the camera to the computer has been packed and is currently in no-man's land.

The tradition is simple. Each member of the family has an inexpensive stocking. Each year we sew something on the stocking that we feel represents the year. My wife and I started this tradition the first Christmas we were married and it's fun to see the space on the stocking changing from plain red to a variety of symbols that represent our lives.

My stocking has several symbols of college (because that has been a big part of my life for several years). I think my favorite symbol is the slug that I put on in 2005. The slug was the symbol from my first real attempt at gardening. I was living on the Oregon coast and we had a SERIOUS slug problem. I would go out every morning with a spray bottle full of ammonia and shoot the slugs. I counted on an typical morning and I shot well over 100 slugs with ammonia (ammonia kills slugs like salt, but it is better for the garden than salt). I also tried containers of beer to drown the slugs (it works, but yeast and water work just as well). Enough about slugs. To make the symbol, I cut a slug out of a piece of fabric (not an easy task). Most of the time we just find a picture on an old t-shirt or something so it takes minimal artistic ability, but in 2005 I cut the slug from an old shirt that my grandfather had given me because that was the year that he passed away. No, I do not associate my grandfather with slugs, but I truly enjoy the memories of my Christmas stocking.

This year I put a bike gear on my stocking. It was a simple iron-on decal that I ironed onto a toilet cloth (as a symbol of the importance of the environment in my life and my efforts to take action).

My wife sewed on a walking stick because she had some back problems and got around with this old nasty walking stick for some time this year. We called the stick a 'Nancy stick' in fond memory of a neighbor in our last house.

The mugwump (5 year old son) sewed on a plus sign because he started school and he enjoys math. Actually I think he enjoys reading and history more, but we already have a book on there from last year.

Six-Pence (3 year old) decided to have a puzzle piece sewn onto his stocking because he loves to do puzzles. I don't know that puzzles are the most monumental thing in this 3-year old's life, but that is what he wanted to put on there, so we did.

Jaguar (the 10 month old) obviously didn't have much say in what went on his stocking, but we decided to put a musical note because when music starts, he really likes to dance. Of my three sons, the youngest has by far the best rhythm.

So what are your favorite holiday traditions?

Pagan Holidays

2008-12-21T16:34:00.002-07:00

I don't usually write about religion on my blog, but today happens to be my favorite holiday (If I've said that before it is because I have several favorites). Today is the winter solstice, the shortest day of the year. One of the reasons that I like today as a holiday is that Halmark hasn't figured it out yet (and I would really prefer to keep it that way).

Today is my favorite holiday due to the symbolism. I'm going to be honest, I know very little about paganism and I don't know completely my church's thoughts on my celebration of this pagan holiday. I'm OK with that because the symbolism surrounding today brings me closer to things that are extremely important to me.

When we talk about the Christmas story we say that it's the day of Christ's birth and then we talk about the shepherds in the fields. Ummm... if the flocks were in the field during Christ's birth then it wasn't the dead of winter, it was likely spring. So why do we celebrate Christmas in the dead of winter? I think it is because most Pagan groups celebrate today, the shortest day of the year. After today the days will get longer and longer (until June 21). The Christians of old didn't know the day Christ was born, but the Pagans in the neigborhood had a 'dead of winter' celebration and they wanted something at the same time. (You will find that in the Bible in the book of Sans)

So I like my Pagan 'dead of winter' celebration.

The reason that I really like this day is because it is the returning of light. Think of light for just a moment. Put yourself in the shoes of an ancient civilization that doesn't live in an equitorial region. What does light mean to you? What does light bring to the world?

Light brings heat. Light also allows photosynthetic plants to do their thing and grow. Plants are sort of important in the world that we live in. We rely heavily on plants for food, and even if you have succumbed to the ills known as the Atkin's Diet you rely on plants to feed the flesh that you eat. So we all rely on light for food.

Oh and something about photosynthesis and the use of carbon dioxide and production of oxygen. Without plants, that wouldn't happen and we wouldn't be able to breath. So without light we would have no food to eat or oxygen to breath. That makes light important for our existance. So I think it's important to celebrate light and what it brings to the world.

More importantly, on this date, this Pagan season for celebrating light, the Christian world has chosen to celebrate the birth of Christ. Christ is the light and life of this world. While I think the early Christians missed the mark by four days, that's OK, today is the real day of Christmas. Today is the day to celebrate not only the return of sunlight, but also the the light and life of the world, Jesus Christ. Like the sunlight that is returning brings all life to the earth, Christ, through his life and death brought life to all who live on the earth.

So today is my Halmark free celebration of light. A day for meditation and reflection of the lights in my life. Obviously I've spoken of nature and Jesus, but also those things that make my life enjoyable like my wife and kids, the oportunities to learn and experience life, and my family and friends that I love and appreciate.

I'm not a big fan of Christmas because I feel that consumerism is working hard to destroy it (although I very much enjoy the traditions my family have), so I want to wish you all (or should I say both of you?) a very merry Pagan celebration of light. Take time to reflect on what light does in your life as well as the sources of light.

Goals

2008-12-18T01:11:00.002-07:00

I have been doing so well at my New Year's Resolution for this past year. I am currently at about 4,200 miles on the van for the year. I was really hoping to stay under 5000 miles, but there is no way. Sure, if you do the math it seems like it would be easy. 800 miles for the last two weeks of the year should allow us to use the car extravagantly, but then we decided to move to Kentucky. I've got about 800 miles before I reach 5000 for the year, but it's about 1600 miles to Kentucky and we hope to be there by new years. Unless someone knows a shortcut that is eluding us, I'm going well over my goal for the year.

On the bright side, I still put more miles on my bike than the van this year. Additionally, our apartment that we got in Lexington (actually it's in Georgetown, just north of Lexington) is about 20 miles from my work. If I ride daily, that will be just under 200 miles/week. I am not, however convinced that I will ride every day. While the main reason for the move is to take a job that I feel will better prepare me for a career than where I was previously, I also intend to spend more time with my family. I've had a couple years of 60+ hour weeks and would rally prefer to cut way back on that number. If I add an hour bike ride to each side of my 8 hour workday, it may be a bigger sacrifice than I'm willing to make. I'll try it out a few times and it's certainly something we're considering as we look for a house to buy.

Sans Couture

2008-12-16T22:21:00.002-07:00

Here's a little story to demonstrate how uncultured I am. This is a conversation between me and the guy next to me on the flight home from Lexington KY... Actually I guess Lexington will be home soon, but anyway. Actually it's probably important to note that the conversation started when he noticed I was reading a Kentucky real estate guide.

Him: You lookin' to move out this way?

Me: It looks like it.

Him: This is a great place to live.

Me: I'm excited about it, but really it's all new to me.

Him: What's your name? What business are you in?

Me: They call me Sans, of the infamous blog, Sansauto (I didn't really say that, I just told him my name). I'd be working with the YMCA helping get people going with exercise programs. What was your name, and what do you do?

Him: I'm Eddie and I'm in the entertainment industry

[At this point I was uncertain about 'the entertainment industry' I could be sitting next to a rock star or a male stripper, why was he being so vague?]

Me: Nice. (I think I say that too often)

[Long moment of silence when we didn't know what to say. He listened to his iphone]

Me (as I was looking through my real estate guide): Do you know anything about Versailles?

Him: Brother, I used to play in every Honky-Tonk in Lexington, but I just don't know the area anymore.

Me: That's fine, so you're in the music industry (he wasn't a male stripper, so I dug a little deeper)?

Him: Ya

Me: So what band are you with? Is it someone I would have heard of?

Him: Are you into country music?

Me: Uhhh. Sort of. I listen to it on occasion, but mostly I listen to NPR and they don't play music. WHo are you with?

Him: Montgomery Gentry

Me: I think I've heard of him, but I couldn't name a song he plays. Do you play guitar for them or something?

Him: It's a Duo

Me: Right, so do you play the guitar with them or something?

Him: No, I'm a lead singer.

Me: So that would make you either Montgomery or Gentry?

Him: Something like that.

I proceeded to have a very nice conversation with Eddie Montgomery. On my trip out to Kentucky I was on four flights and this guy was probably the easiest to talk to. He wasn't into himself and was far from what I expected from a Music star. We didn't talk the whole flight, but he was really a good conversationalist. (Just in case you were wondering, he was listening to Boston on his iphone). He really seemed interested in why I was there. He seemed sincerely excited about me getting a new job and bringing my family out to Kentucky.

The flight ended and as he got up, he turned and said, "Congratulations on the new job, I think your family will really like it here. It sounds like you're really doing what you love; that's important."

Since he was officially standing, the others on the flight who had been eavesdropping took their opportunity to ask questions like, "When are you going to play in Lexington again?" (Maybe next new year, if not before) and "Did your song reach number one this week?" (yes).

So I yelled up to him, "-and congratulations to you on having the number one country music song in the nation this week". OK, I didn't say that. Should I have?

Anyway, I don't get starstruck. Music stars do nothing for me. They're just normal people, except I perceive them as being more arrogant than the average person. This guy surprised me. He made me feel like a million bucks and congratulated me on my career as he flew off to New York to play on the CBS Morning Show. He was far from arrogant. He taught me a thing or two about humility.

The last I saw of him was entering the Cincinnati airport where he held the door for a line of people who were on the plane with us. Now we're preparing to move to his town.

Success and Failure

2008-12-11T13:34:00.002-07:00

I haven't been writing a lot lately. You see, there has been a lot on my mind, so I've struggled to put together blog posts. So this is a sort of catch up blog of what's going on in my life, but also includes some interesting thoughts.

I am currently attending school seeking a PhD. I have finished all of my coursework and have a dissertation to write. I looked around at jobs. I contemplated what I wanted to do with my life. I considered what a PhD would do for me and what jobs would do for me. I thought a lot about success and failure.

What does it mean to succeed in life? Often in our culture we think of the accumulation of monetary wealth as success. The attainment of higher education is often considered success. Accumulating letters behind your name is considered success. Why is it that having more is considered 'success'?

Our culture's definition of success differs from mine. I think that success is doing what God wants you to do. I do not think that God considers wealth as success. Don't get me wrong, I believe that wealthy people could be successful, I even know some, but success does not depend on wealth or status.

I had a decision to make. I am in doctoral program that would lead to a prestigious degree if I continued, or I could take a job and pursue what I really love in life. If I drop out of a doctoral program, is that a failure? According to many it is. On the other hand, is it a failure to pass up what I could consider the best step for my career?

After much thought and prayer I looked at the options and tried to consider what God would have me do. I am going to give up a PhD (although I may pursue an opportunity to finish a dissertation if it arises) and pursue a relatively low paying job in Kentucky doing what I love.

Here's the thing. A PhD will open doors that I'm not interested in. So what is the use of opening the doors? The job opportunity is with an organization that is doing something I've always wanted to do (providing opportunities for physical activity to those who need it most whether they can afford it or not). Sure, the position isn't typically for someone with my education, but it is a position that I really care about with an organization that I'm excited to move up in. I really feel that I would have regretted missing this opportunity and continuing with a PhD more than I will regret dropping out of a PhD program.

Unconventional, maybe even illogical, but I'm going to discontinue my doctoral studies, move to Kentucky and follow my dreams of helping people improve their health. Truth be told, I feel more successful now than at almost any other time in my life.

Hopefully, I'll post a little more frequently now. Although I also need to pack up my stuff and my family and move across the country. I may be busy.

This morning

2008-12-05T13:05:00.002-07:00

I was getting ready for my ride into school today when I heard footsteps in the living room. Although it's a little too early for the kids to be getting up, it's not that uncommon. I tried to be quiet just in case he decided to return to bed.

I watched him. He went into the kitchen and was struggling to get into the cabinet where we keep the garbage can. (The second rubber band was too much for him). He was determined and i was really hoping he would go back to bed, so I went and silently helped him.

I opened the cabinet. He wiped the booger off his finger into the trash can and went back to bed.

I have the most incredible wife. She has my kids trained that it is not only bad to eat it, but also that you can't wipe it on random objects. Wow.

The other kid

2008-11-27T12:11:00.003-07:00

My last post was a video of the two older boys. I neglected to talk about the little one. So I thought I would write a couple of things about him today.

First off, I think he has started walking. He is a covert walker. My wife and I will sit across from each other and try to get him to walk (just like in all of the home moves you see). As soon as we let go, he sits down. However, my wife and I have both found him taking steps in the middle of the room when we came into a room. I think he's hiding his new talent. Don't get me wrong, he only takes a couple of steps away from the furniture, but I have a feeling that he's going to chase his brothers across the room before we are able to encourage him to walk on our agenda.

So I was going to the bathroom the other day and he wanted to join me. I don't know what his thing is with the bathroom, but the kid would live in there if we didn't keep the door shut to prevent him from sucking on the toilet seat.

Anyway, I came home and rushed into the bathroom and didn't close the door (bad habit, don't worry, if we invite you over for dinner, I'll remember to close it). I'm standing there doing my thing and in crawls my son with a huge grin on his face. He pulls himself up on the cabinet and starts reaching as if to wash his hands in the 'running water' I lifted my leg up to prevent the hand washing and he instantly clung to my let. So I was essentially standing on one leg, going to the bathroom with an infant clinging to my other leg. The next thing I knew, the kid had swung around and his head popped between my legs and he looked up at me with a great big grin. I think the grin may have said, "I WON!". Anyway, he was lucky that I had already finished, otherwise I would have likely peed on his head.

So close the door if you are going to go to the bathroom.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Distractions

2008-11-22T14:41:00.003-07:00

My grandmother has this tendency to cook in one set of pots and then transfer everything into serving dishes to be placed on the table. While I certainly don't think it's bad, let's just say I've never been the type to do that. I'll be more specific; in college I would cook my noodles in a pot on the stove, drain the water, add red sauce and eat out of the pot. An entire meal and I would dirty one pot and one fork. It was incredibly efficient. And I could store my dishes in my room and not be accused of contributing to the pile of dishes in the sink.

So the other night we were eating and I realized why Grammie used serving dishes. She had distracted kids (mom?). Anyway, we got a video of the older two boys at dinner. Notice that as they talk, they are looking at the pot instead of us. I think that they like their distorted reflections.

I especially like the end when the Mugwump is flexing in the reflection. Just like his dad, the only time it appears that he has muscles is when the reflection is distorted